this post was submitted on 19 Mar 2024
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We used to leave on our bikes for the day (no phones, so basically unreachable). The only rule was you had be back by dinner.
Tbf, as a parent now, I wouldn't let my kids go unsupervised that long without some periodic check-ins throughout the day. I mean, I definitely remember much of my childhood being like this, but in retrospect it also led to us doing lots of stupid/dangerous shit that did result in a few ER visits over the years (e.g. broken arms, legs, concussions, stitches, etc).
Children need dangerous play in order to develop into successful adults.
I don't disagree. My comment was saying a healthier balance is what I would prefer when my kids are a bit older. That article fails to be well-rounded and only focuses on proving their hypothesis versus presenting data in an objective manner. For example:
Yet just a bit earlier in the article, she mentions this:
So how can they rule out that it's safer now because the amount of kids engaging in unsupervised, dangerous/risky activities is the lowest it's ever been? (As a side note: In the US, I think she also ignores the very real financial problems with serious injuries. A medical bill for a broken bone or other serious injury can cost some families tens of thousands of dollars without insurance. Back in the 60s/70s and earlier, medical bills were way, way more affordable than now.)
There are other problems, as well. She seems to only focus on "intensive parenting" and showing that structured activities are a negative thing. Whereas articles like this, https://parenthetical.wisc.edu/2017/01/23/acing-afterschool-making-extracurricular-activities-work-for-your-teen/ , argue that structured activities can be beneficial, too. Later near the end she does discuss simply prioritizing it versus going all in, but the way it's presented throughout the rest of the article makes it seem like structured activities are entirely a negative thing and unsupervised, unstructured activities is the best way for kids to thrive.
Anyway, I'm an advocate for simply striking a healthy balance between the two: Don't overburden your kids with supervised, structured activities, and don't let them become feral by completely going hands-off with their free time. In other words, gently guide, mentor, and support them. :)
no kids are getting stupid ideas from their fondleslabs ?
It was definitely the time to do stupid shit, but it was also great freedom. I remember constructing skate parks in abandoned factories that would rival some of the best pre fabs today. We made a 2 story indoor go-ped track. Obviously very dangerous stuff, but i wouldn't trade those memories for anything.
Haha, same here, but ours were packed dirt trails with dirt and wood ramps in the woods (our neighborhood had a large forested area nearby). Fun stuff, and definitely some very fond memories.
But, I was definitely one of the kids that broke their leg (my femur) and had to get 4 steel pins that stuck out of my skin to set the bone while it healed for about 3 months before getting a regular cast for the rest of the healing. It was pure agony, the entire healing and physical rehab recovery process took almost a year (my school even sent an in-home tutor to my house for a couple of hours a day since I had to stay at home for several months). I'd never want anyone to go through that, particularly my kids.
That being said, I do think it's important for kids to have a degree of privacy and autonomy, I just don't think I'd be kosher with the amount of unsupervised freedom that I had as a kid (my kids are still <5, so I have some time before they're semi-free range animals).
Dirt tracks were amazing. We had a few, one of which was a huge bowl in the ground. The jumps were enormous and I always thought "whos hitting these?" Like pro level size and you would never see anyone on them. Then you'd hear "so and so" did a 3 on that one. It made for some good myths. Luckily there was so much empty space, we'd just make some jumps for our skill level.
So you are saying maybe two years?
I was sent to the corner store at age four to buy a carton of cigarettes for my dad. 1960's
My parents let me do this (early to mid 2010's) and I'm eternally grateful for it. Going out 10, 20, 30 km on my own at that age really expanded my horizons. I can't imagine how different my outlook would be if I was banned from leaving the cul-de-sac, like one of my friends was. I've found that even to this day I'm the most adventurous and the most willing to risk uncomfortable situations out of all my friends.
The sheer amount of exercise is a huge benefit. Riding all day (to a friends house in the next town over or to check out an abandoned factory you heard about or cool spot by a river) 30 km/20 miles was nothing. Im baffled by it. That is some serious cardio.