Sadly, this is not the Onion.

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Champagne sales sink because people don’t want to celebrate (edition.cnn.com)

submitted 8 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/thefirsteverredditor on 2025-01-20 21:49:16.

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Treasury Committee question if new Office for Value for Money is value for money (news.sky.com)

submitted 8 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/F0urLeafCl0ver on 2025-01-20 20:18:05.

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‘Viagra honey’: the illegal aphrodisiac France can’t get enough of (www.thetimes.com)

submitted 8 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/fuzzball517 on 2025-01-20 18:44:27.

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Matthew McConaughey Says It's Time Anthony Hopkins Was Crowned PEOPLE's "Sexiest Man Alive" (fictionhorizon.com)

submitted 8 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/fuzzball517 on 2025-01-20 18:25:54.

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Title (reddit-uploaded-media.s3-accelerate.amazonaws.com)

submitted 8 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Yamza_ on 2025-01-21 01:48:49.

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Biden Issues Pardons Hours Before Handing Over Presidency (www.tagde24.com)

submitted 8 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/gay_boy_us on 2025-01-20 18:03:25.

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Alabama and Mississippi will also honor Robert E. Lee on Martin Luther King Jr. Day (apnews.com)

submitted 8 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/RedditIsAGranfaloon on 2025-01-20 17:43:10.

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President Biden pardons family members in final minutes of presidency (abcnews.go.com)

submitted 8 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/JaySierra86 on 2025-01-20 17:01:45.

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Japanese aquarium cheers up lonely sunfish with cardboard cutouts of people (www.cnn.com)

submitted 8 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/SelectiveSanity on 2025-01-20 16:49:56.

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South African police say ringleader in illegal gold mining disaster allowed to escape by officers (apnews.com)

submitted 18 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Leather-Paramedic-10 on 2025-01-20 14:19:05.

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Biden Issues Pardons Hours Before Handing Over Presidency (www.tagde24.com)

submitted 18 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/gay_boy_us on 2025-01-20 15:57:10.

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Maybe Canadians were the problem, not Trudeau (www.theglobeandmail.com)

submitted 18 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/origutamos on 2025-01-20 15:46:18.

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Teen enraged by TikTok ban sets fire to Wisconsin congressman's office (www.techspot.com)

submitted 18 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Bad-Umpire10 on 2025-01-20 14:31:49.

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Campaign to not complain for 30 days launches in Netherlands on Blue Monday (nltimes.nl)

submitted 18 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/mawhrinskeleton on 2025-01-20 09:20:35.

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Doom ported to a standalone Microsoft Word document — plays well but there's no sound (www.tomshardware.com)

submitted 1 day ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/ThatWayneO on 2025-01-20 04:07:09.

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Alabama and Mississippi will also honor Robert E. Lee on Martin Luther King Jr. Day (apnews.com)

submitted 1 day ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/Disorderly_Fashion on 2025-01-20 06:28:25.

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Gaza ceasefire: Freed Israeli hostages given 'gift bags' by Hamas (www.wionews.com)

submitted 1 day ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/apndrew on 2025-01-20 05:32:18.

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‘State of New Illinois’ committee continues push to secede from Cook County (fox2now.com)

submitted 1 day ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/zechchuber on 2025-01-20 03:48:33.

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Penguin Divorce Rates Soar On Phillip Island (10play.com.au)

submitted 1 day ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/ohmyroots on 2025-01-19 22:53:36.

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United plane hits coyote during takeoff at Chicago O'Hare Airport; FAA investigating (abc7chicago.com)

submitted 1 day ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/miauguau44 on 2025-01-19 21:40:07.

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TikTok ban cited by man suspected of setting fire to US congressman's office in Fond du Lac (www.fdlreporter.com)

submitted 1 day ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/orchid_breeder on 2025-01-19 20:54:56.

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Biden says not taking more credit for accomplishments is key regret of his presidency (www.cnn.com)

submitted 1 day ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/SamDiep on 2025-01-19 19:50:44.

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Saskatchewan pig spleen weather prognosticator carries on family tradition (www.cbc.ca)

submitted 1 day ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/elephantsgraveyard on 2025-01-19 18:29:01.

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Japan’s elderly are lonely and struggling. Some women choose to go to jail instead (www.cnn.com)

submitted 1 day ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/pargofan on 2025-01-19 17:02:36.

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Thaksin asks Naomi Campbell to help turn Thais into supermodels (www.bangkokpost.com)

submitted 1 day ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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The original post: /r/nottheonion by /u/TDYDave2 on 2025-01-19 13:15:16.