underreacting

joined 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 days ago (3 children)

It depends on if the subject of the sentence (the person) is doing the thing (being active) or having the thing done to them (being passive). Think like this:

A helper (help-ER) is someone who is helping/doing the help. A caller (call-ER) is calling someone else. A botherer (bother-ER) is someone who is doing the bothering.

Someone who is recieving bother is being bothered (bother-ED), one who is getting help is being helped (help-ED), or getting calls is being called (call-ED).

God-botherer is someone who is god-bothering (bothering god). God-bothered is someone being bothered by god.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Sleep mask covering my eyes. My chambers may be flooded with light to chase away the ghouls of darkness, yet not a hint of light will reach my vision to disturb my slumber.

Also the tightness feels kinda comforting, and I've started to associate it with good sleep and fall asleep faster now because of it

Ps. And no energy drink, coffee or caffeinated or sugary soda past 16.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

We can't fix other peoples issues for them.

We can choose to support them if they are actively trying to fix their own issues.

We can also decide that even though they are trying the impact is too big on us and distance ourselves.

But if they aren't actually trying to better themselves there is nothing we can do except protect ourselves.

Your sister needs to look into co-dependence and trauma-bonding (if not in this case then for future reference), and focus on becoming emotionally independent rather than confusing nurturing with doormat. She can only fix her own issues, not her friends. And learn that not every friend is worth the title.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

I would be fine about being asked, asking wouldn't affect the relationship, but I would say no because I don't want it.

If they did it anyway, or without even asking, I would end the relationship and probably make a police report. How many other boundaries are they willing to cross or have already crossed? Is there a camera in my shower? It would make me incredibly worried to deal with that level of disrespect.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 week ago

I saw "women", plural.

Just think it's unnecessary to drag women for having rich husbands, when there is so much more relevant shit to drag these specific women for.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 week ago

I fail to see how calling others "bat shit crazy" and "sick" is not name calling, but "numbskull" is...

How about you clean up your own porch before complaining about your neighbours?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago

Are you sure you're underperforming, or is that just an idea you came up with yourself? Have you talked to a boss or manager about their expectations for your role and if you are meeting those expectations?

It may just be a self-sabotaging thought, and getting confirmation that you are meeting expectations could let you relax and work at a preferred or natural pace without stressing about your performance.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I see you've thought about this.

I've just seen one too many winters with icy roads and cars being stuck and (temporarily) abandoned making roads between towns unusable for a while.

I imagine that but worse with everyone fleeing the city and getting turned, being unprepared for a journey, running out of gas all over the place - not just cities. Maybe they can go off-road and get around a perpendicularly abandoned vehicle or two but eventually there will be an obstacle no truck can bridge.

So for me, I think two wheels for mobility. But that would also depend on what kind of zombie and what kind of apocalypse. Are they fast or slow; do they hunt by ear, sight, smell; is it almost instantaneous or after a year-long pandemic, do they travel in pack or avoid each other, how do they perish, etc.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 week ago

Told me that I was welcome to participate in any meeting and that my input was valued, but also told me when a meeting wouldn't involve me or my work and I was free to sit almost any of them out. Even for regularly scheduled meetings, they'd let each of us know if we were actually needed that week or simply welcome. I appreciated being able to decide best where that time should go instead of wasting away in meetings.

Some weeks would be like 15 hours of meetings for the team, with only like 4 hours directly involving me. But I don't have to go wherever my team goes, we're not codependent like that, lol.

Also they listened for input, and actually listened. Even for things outside my expertise, if I had an idea it would be considered and implemented if it was suitable.

Fairly regularly (every other month or so) they'd pop their head in and be like "wanna go for a walk?, I have a gap in 30 min", and we'd have a 15 min walk-n-talk about the work place, time management, work / life balance, teamwork, suggestions and feedback for management - anything about working there that wasn't about the actual work.

They were really all about listening to the employees in every area.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

How would you navigate that through streets full of abandoned vehicles and debris? A bicycle is quiet, faster than a human or zombie, easy to service, easy to navigate and even carry where it can't go, and don't require fuel. If you want something faster and fuel driven, a motorcycle would be better than any car.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

Yes. If I feel comfortable enough to want to work somewhere during/after an interview, I feel comfortable enough to talk about my challenges as well as my strengths. I spent decades unaware of this part of myself and why I couldn't function like I was expected to - I don't want to go back to struggling to pass as "normal" and fail those expectations. I am lucky enough to be able to set different expectations for how I do my job well, now.

I'm in northern Europe, and I don't think I've been discriminated against because of this. I have asked and gotten accommodations for tests during the interview process (more time), which then led to interviews.

I have disclosed my ADHD and received job offers in my last two interviews. My ADHD tells me I can do both jobs, because fun! My experience tells me to pick the one where I can work from home part time.

It much depends on where you are, your field of work and your seniority/experience.

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