myeyesburn

joined 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

They are also stealing all the toilets from the police stations. So far, officers have nothing to go on.

 
[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago

Giving me a hand job. So even if I lose, I've still won. 100 times.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 months ago

So now I know what my wife is referring to when she says I'm as majestic as an eagle. She just means what I look like when I first wake up.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago

Not if he said, "No one will ever believe you."

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Glad you aren't drinking beer. You could get sand in your Schlitz. 😁

For those unaware, Schlitz is a brand of beer in the US. 😉

[–] [email protected] 15 points 7 months ago

Nope, not legal.

Believe it or not, straight to jail.

Or, that's a paddlin'.

Both applicable. Take your pick.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago

Don't forget the blow!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I'm not your buddy, pal!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

It's poop. He eats his poop, doesn't he...?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Poor you!! 😆

[–] [email protected] 8 points 7 months ago

Not Tilly. She's a little jerk when she wants to be. Won't leave her big sis alone. 😆

[–] [email protected] 50 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (2 children)

Emma

and Tilly!

 

It's a saddleback catapillar. The thorns have venom. Felt it on my neck. Never seen one before, but will definitely be on the lookout from now on.

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