killer_penguin

joined 1 year ago
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39
SLPT putting a student driver sticker on your car will get you out of all tickets. The police will be more understanding a let you off with a warning every time. (lemmy.world)
276
SLPT: When grocery shopping, if you see something you were going to buy in a person's cart, feel free to take it. It’s not stealing because the other person doesn’t own it until they pay for the item. (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
21 comments fedilink
76
SLPT Gym not letting you cancel your membership or making it difficult? Start working out completely naked and making very weird noises drawing attention to yourself. (lemmy.world)
 
37
SLPT Cops work all day in the public this can be tiring and their time is valuable. Be considerate when you get pulled over and run towards their car with your information. (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
5 comments fedilink
25
SLPT put your contacts in lotion, so they won't dry your eyes out. (lemmy.world)
SLPT If you get mugged give them as much money as possible. You can say it was a charitable donation and write it off on your taxes. in c/[email protected]
[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Make sure to ask for one

SLPT: Win your next boxing match by slathering your gloves in raw eggs and chicken so your opponent will get salmonella and have to surrender the fight. in c/[email protected]
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Got poison effect on those gloves

45
SLPT If you get mugged give them as much money as possible. You can say it was a charitable donation and write it off on your taxes. (lemmy.world)
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SLPT Make sure to keep a ruler under your pillow so you know how long you slept. (lemmy.world)
34
SLPT attack someone wjth a bodyguard to ensure they get their moneys worth. (lemmy.world)
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SLPT adding two mini fridges together makes one regular fridge. And cheaper! (lemmy.world)
 
3
SLPT car bouncing/shaking a lot? Wear or sand your tire tread off to make the ride smoother. (lemmy.world)
Chorizo Gnocchi Traybake in c/[email protected]
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

I just made a gnocchi dish last week something very similar to this! Next time I'm going to try this

1
SLPT bean. (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
1 comments fedilink
 

Big bean

70
SLPT eat the paper in the fortune cookie so it becomes shit, just like all your other hopes and dreams (lemmy.world)
SLPT Unable to buy the fun fireworks in your state? Make your own by attaching a cardboard tube full of glitter, minerals, and gunpowder to a model rocket. in c/[email protected]
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Making the fireworks like it’s Minecraft over here!

SLPT: Taxi driver too slow? Simply throw them out of the car and drive yourself instead. in c/[email protected]
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I saw that documentary too! This also works with anyone's car including police.

SLPT Do your misplace your kids often? Have them swallow an air tag. Cover it in yogurt to help get it down. in c/[email protected]
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Round 2!

SLPT Need radiation, but live in the US and can't afford it? Travel to Chernobyl where you can get all the radiation for free! in c/[email protected]
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

That is too funny lol

SLPT Self hosting stuff on your home network? having trouble reaching it from outside your network? Turn all security off including your firewall to gain access. in c/[email protected]
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Would not recommend posting something like that in c/selhosted

SLPT silica gel is another way of saying salt, save it when you get one and use it on your food! You'll never have to buy salt again in c/[email protected]
[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

This is a shitty life pro tip

Leaving this up as it is not more dangerous than any other post on this community

From cutenottragic https://azpoison.com/sites/default/files/poisonology_what_happens_if_i_eat_silica_gel.pdf

SLPT have bad breath? Spray lysol in your mouth it kills 99.9% of bacteria! in c/[email protected]
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Definitely not an ad, but right as I posted it I was like hmm that kinda looks like one 😂

SLPT Big Airports don't want you to know that you can walk to the place you want to go. Rather than paying outrageous ticket costs. in c/[email protected]
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Maybe a short swim too!

SLPT If you slip the zookeeper some money you can do anything you want in the zoo. Like jumping into the gorilla enclosure. in c/[email protected]
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

For that stunt? At least $100

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