ShouldIHaveFun

Not if they jump from the front of the trolley

Phone screen pixel density actually went down in the last 10 years due to bigger screens.

It may become complicated if some day she does fall in love and if it's with someone else. She may be faced with hard choices if this happens.

I haven't had any device that wasn't recognized by Linux in 15 years. Do you have examples of hardware that "normal people" use and does not work?

You'd need to have a job first

I also hated it when I had a OnePlus 8. Luckily it fell in the floor and the screen broke. My insurance repaid me the full price and with that I bought an Xperia 5 II. It is sooo much better with its small form factor, flat screen, its stereo front facing speakers, it's headphone jack and its long battery life!

Have a look at the Xperia 10 Series (for example the Xperia 10 VI), they have all those features for what I find is a reasonable price.

Sony Xperia still have front facing speakers.

I really like that Sony didn't abandoned good features just to follow the hype. Some of those features are a headphone jack, an SD card and a small screen (big screens also available in the 1 series).

How do you know the "average person" doesn't do childish things when out in the wood by themselves?

Looks to me like a real hat you could see at a German music festival... if it were built out of empty beer cans and duct tape of course.

I'm curious, do people do this kind of stupid things (though funny, I must admit) at festivals all around the world?

There are some reactor designs that run on waste of standard reactors. It would solve two of your points for at least some decades.

Beware the short length cycle, you may soon need to wear those very short shorts like in the 80s