Not The Onion

11812 readers

778 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

Links to news stories from...
...credible sources, with...
...their original headlines, that...
...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Comments must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 1 year ago

MODERATORS

[email protected]

259

Thousands of people are reportedly lining up to have a portion of their skull removed and one of Elon Musk's brain chips implanted (www.businessinsider.com)

submitted 10 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

112 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Earlier this year, the US Food and Drug Administration gave Neuralink, which Musk cofounded in 2016, approval to launch human trials of its device that Musk has described as a "Fitbit in your skull." The FDA had previously rejected Neuralink's bid for human testing in March over safety concerns, Reuters reported, including that the wires connected to the brain chip could move within a subject's head or that the chip could overheat.

(page 2) 50 comments

sorted by: hot top controversial new old

[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago

I can see 2024 headlines: "Neuralink test subjects try to crash into pedestrians or blow up before reaching space. Workers implanted the wrong chips due to time pressure from the CEO"

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago (2 children)

AKA thousands of people are so terminally stupid that even such an implant cannot cause any damage to already f-uped brain remains.

load more comments (2 replies)

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago

Didn’t realize so many people have already had lobotomies.

[–] Trigger2_2000 5 points 10 months ago

Well, there's obviously nothing inside their skulls anyway 😜.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Man I'd love to get this if literally anyone else was behind it, I always wanted to be a cyborg.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

The best part of ShadowRun's dystopian future: the cyberware.

load more comments (1 replies)

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

The moment this becomes widespread you know there are going to be people figuring out how to jailbreak the chips. I'm down for the idea of cybernetics but no way would I get any kind of implant even capable of a wireless connection.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

This is how the zombie apocalypse begins.. loads crossbow...

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

On the bright side even at worst case scenario nothing of value will be lost.

load more comments