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DAE Feel the Urge to Connect with an Old Friend Again but at the Same Time Feel Afraid/Relunctant? (i.imgur.com)

submitted 1 year ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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DAE Feel the Urge to Connect with an Old Friend Again but at the Same Time Feel Afraid/Relunctant? What do you do in these cases?

Sometimes an old friend randomly pops up in my mind and the thought of catching up with them feels good. But at the same time it feels overwhelming, like I'm stepping out of bounds of some sorts.

Side Note: I'm using Jerboa for Lemmy and I'm not able to do text posts, hence the gorgeous Across the Spider-Verse image. How do I do a text post?

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[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

For a time I felt like that. There was this girl with I had been friends with for about a decade. She had been there through my best and worst and put up with my shit. Then I got worse, kinda pushed her away, and we stopped talking. For a while I felt like I missed her (in reality I had feeling for her), but with some time I realized we also grew apart because we grew into different people, and that's fine. I missed the feeling, not the person, and the feeling likely won't come back.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

I'm gonna be honest I've lost friends because of reaching out.

At least 5 friends I had before I stopped talking because I simply was not in a good mental state to keep using social media/messaging daily, I was in a different country, and none of us had started a conversation.

I felt overwhelmed about it as well. Sometimes I even felt more nervous about reaching out than going to a job interview.

As soon as I sent the text asking how they had been, the first text I received was "You think you can just pick up the phone and text again like nothing happened? You never text"

They didn't even want to know how I was doing. I was taken aback but I immediately asked "I'm sorry I couldn't reach out before, but, why did you never text either?" And they just blocked me.

The good thing I can take from this is that I think actual friends would be happy that their friends reached out.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Oh yeah, the majority of my friendships have ended through just losing touch and me being hesitant to make the first move to reach back out. But at the risk of being hypocritical, just remember the proverb: "The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago, the second best time is now."