this post was submitted on 06 Apr 2025
104 points (88.8% liked)

Freeze Peach Patriots

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Some women even sell their jarred farts but I have a whole basement of them collecting dust.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

So uh...how much for a dusty jar of farts?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 day ago (2 children)

It’s a buyers market right now so how much are you willing to pay?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago

Can I order in bulk?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Well uh, it's for a friend. For a...birthday gift. So...pretty much anything you ask. I'm desperate. I mean, they are desperate. For this gift.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

In the winter I mostly eat cabbage and in the summer for reasons I don’t want to get into my diet is mostly wolf meat so that’ll be a factor in the pricing.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

With respect, I'm only interested in the oldest, dustiest jars. If it was a good year for cabbage, ok, if it was good year for wolf, also ok.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

…I thought it was for a friend.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Look man just gimme the fuckin jar!!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

This is a joke account right?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 day ago (2 children)

this is serious if i even accidentally say pew about my wifes farts im immediately the badguy for making her feel insecure but then when i fart she says YOU STINK and makes me leave the room

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Have you tried communicating how you feel?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago)

i havent but i guess thats as good an idea as any I suppose

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

This is absolutely a joke account 🤣

[–] RIPandTERROR 1 points 1 day ago

Its a joke account or a joke person 😅

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago