Give yourself all the time you need. Grief needs room to be able to manage. It took me a looong time to deal with the world again when my fiance passed, and I'm still figuring it out.
As hard as it is try and do little things to keep yourself sane, even things like cooking, cleaning and going for a walk get very hard to do, but if you don't make time your emotions will get even harder to manage. I neglected a lot of things and it really brought me to a bad place.
My heart goes out to you, take care of yourself. Sending love your way <3