this post was submitted on 21 Aug 2023
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[–] [email protected] 48 points 1 year ago (3 children)

dating apps are fucking miserable. cold texting a stranger is miserable, i have no idea how i'm supposed to establish proper rapport and interest with fucking cutsey chatup lines

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago

Yes, use IRC instead

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago

Easy. Get their attention by whatever means necessary.

Talk about things that are interesting to you. Ask them about things that they are interested in.

Actually listen and show genuine interest in the things that they like by asking questions and following up on things that they tell you.

If they do that for you too, great. Continue to build rapport, go on dates, fall in love, get married, build a life together, have kids, become happy.

If they don't, don't take it personally and just move on. If they're not interested in you, then you should not be interested in them. Figuring out this part is hard, but once you do, you will save so much time and mental.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 year ago

Dating apps are miserable but not for mentioned reasons.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 year ago (2 children)

"how's your day going?"

"How was your weekend?"

" Any plans for the week?"

These are cheap, lazy ways to start a conversation. Give them a go, Plankton

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

And when they respond, be interested in what they do. Ask questions, make follow up questions etc.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Step 1: be attractive
Step 2: wait

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Can I skip step 1, for reasons?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Sadly, no. Not if you want success on dating apps as a dude.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

The trap in "Be attractive, don't be unattractive" is that assuming Rule #1 is just about looks is a violation of Rule #2

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

I stick with this guy and violate Rule #2.

[–] SiyahGuraag 2 points 1 year ago

Me too. I want to skip the first step too.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (2 children)

You can tell some joke tinder appropriate. You can look those up on the internet or come with your own.

You can also ask some question about her profile or something you see in the picture.

Not the best things you can do, but would get you a little bit further.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I agree. But last time I did that stuff (4 years ago?) most female profiles were empty and the pictures were meaningless. Except for that one I am still with today.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

So you took the only one??

You bastard

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Yes, that is true. That is the reason dating apps suck. Most of the girls either are protecting their privacy aggressively to avoid awkward situations IRL or they just fill in with junk. Other are also way too busy to answer antybody.

[–] CanadianCarl 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Heard you are looking for a stud. I have the std, all I need is u.

Like that joke?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Try it and give us the results.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

do you ever wonder if the world might be slightly happier if there were more bi/pansexual folks?