Transfem

Your orientation as it relates to you and your orientation as it relates to society are both important. A lesbian and a straight cis man are both attracted to women, but their experiences are very different, so I think having multiple options that we can use to describe our experiences is great. We find power in finding the right words to understand ourselves :)

Often, a lot of trans girls early in their journey of self ownership hesitate to use the label lesbian for themselves, because imposter syndrome is hard to overcome.

But that gets better with time too.

Either way, it doesn't matter what labels you use or why, what matters is that they are the labels that are helping to empower you and helping you to navigate the world. If they're doing that, they're the right labels :)

Like girls so much you became one. That's a pro move right there.

The language around sexuality is imperfect at best. I wouldn't worry too hard about it though. Just do what feels right to you.

You can always say “I like girls” explicitly in conversation

Back when I was a young girl who thought she was a guy (I stole that line from Stephane Stirling, and will use it forever), I had always joked I was a lesbian, because if a girl who liked girls was lesbian, than so was I. Side note, it's weird how your brain drops crap like that on you, and you don't come out to yourself til you're 37. Anyways, a year an a half ago, I realized I was bi. I have a thing for big, hunky guys, almost exclusively, on the masculine side. If it weren't for that little self discovery, welllll... I can safely say I called myself out on that one. Even now, though I do describe myself as bi, I do have a heavy preference for feminism. At least, until I discover if my lust for women is either scientific or carnal. Kinda been coming to the realization I probably wasn't wanting their body, I was wanting to have their body.

Sorry for oversharing...

Well it does actually make more sense. The labels hetero and homosexual were made from the heteronormative perspective and are closely related to the " straight -> normal | gay -> disease " narrative. The term homosexual was used first to discriminate to mostly men who like other men, regardless of the modern concept of homosexuality. They didn't think much about sexuality, if it was different it must be Homosexuality or Lesbianism. The terms are just an acient relic from times of Hitler or Bismarck, from times when gays got regularly imprisoned, beaten up or killed for being gay.

The rest is just me Ranting about labels:

I have found that actually labels don't really make much sense. Many people are trying to find a label for themselves but can't so they're trying to force themselves in a drawer they later find out doesn't fit and at least when it comes to trans people in combination with sexualities people start to question the real meaning of labels. I am happy for all who have found a label but from my perspective it's just another way of putting people into drawers. Actually gender and sexuality is not static, but it's just another aspect of your personality that changes with time. Labels are a way of oversimplifying the complexity of our selves and while I do acnowledge that abstraction might be useful in many situations, we should not need the labels of the lgbtq+ community as just as the term homosexual itself it's purpose is to just discriminate and differenciate between people who are essentially to be seen as equal. It should not matter if I feel drawn to guys and girls as in the end we still have to judge by the individual in every case. Sexual and Gender identity tells you nothing about what a person did, does or will do, it doesn't tell you anything about what a person was, will be or is. I think our all goal should be to see labels as obsolete. We should not need a label to accept ourselves and others and we should accept ourselves and others as the indiviuals they are.

i 100% agree! its so frustrating that the commonly used labels imply both the gender of me and the people im attracted to. id use those words you mentioned if only they werent so ugly

Got curious, ended up here: https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Gynesexual Wondering what current discourse is on whether it's transphobic? It seems to have gotten more popularity since last i looked. Honestly femmesexual and mascsexual sounds more appealing to us without any real reference to genitals or specific genders? Plus it's just easier for our perma-fried brain to remember~

I agree we should change the labels. I just wanted to say that I did find it interesting how when I was young I tried really hard to just be a gay man, even though I knew I was trans, I figured my life would be easier if I could just be a gay man instead. It never felt right to me, but now that I've transitioned, it feels completely natural to call myself a gay woman. It just reinforces for me that you can't change your sexual orientation no matter how hard you try. For a lot of people, one or the other just fits better.