this post was submitted on 04 Mar 2024
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[–] [email protected] 18 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I understand this. I was underemployed for a while, so I was doing tutoring American English online. Since I was working graves, my schedule meant I ended up with clients from SE Asia, China, Japan.

After a few months, I found better work and didn't need to tutor as much. I cut my availability and was down to 2, then one.

The one I still tutor is a Filipina in nursing school. Most people, when they find that out, go straight to the "I'm a creep/She wants a green card" duality.

I get tired of explaining that she actually qualifies for permanent residency as soon as she gets her work visa. She doesn't need me at all to come to the US to work.

There are plenty of legitimate organizations and agencies that help Filipino nurses get jobs and visas at minimal cost above the required fees.

She has mentioned that she'd prefer to live with me and would be open to a relationship with me, even though I am older...much older.

I leave that last bit out when talking to folks because it makes me sound like a creep. I totally get why people would think that.

On the other hand, an attractive, intelligent, hardworking, and fun younger woman is interested in me? It's a challenge to say no to that.

[–] [email protected] -4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Most people, when they find that out, go straight to the “I’m a creep/She wants a green card” duality.

Pro-tip. When someone says something like that just stare at them. When they start getting nervous and ask you a question like "what?" coldly ask them to repeat what they just said and perhaps elaborate on it. Keep starring even after they backoff or apologize. Keep it up until they walk away.

No one will ever question your love again because people are fucking cowards and bigots are even more cowardly than most.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago

It's like you didn't even read their comment and just jumped to "make them explain it!" like that's going to shame some 50yr old who thinks his buddy is picking up a mail-order bride.