this post was submitted on 21 Feb 2024
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TenForward: Where Every Vulcan Knows Your Name
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Is she really?
I actually didn't know. The difference seemed trivial to me, and it still does. It really doesn't change their message or anything.
It never bothered me at all, nevermind bothering me enough to dig into information about them to figure it out; regardless, that's a nice thing to know in the situation.
I hope she's doing well.
I mean, usually when theres two names in wikipedia its because they transitioned from one to the other, to me she looks like her identified gender, but I guess I can see why others didnt. I just double checked with a quick google search, it wasnt an intense investigation
I can see why people cared. That's just not me.
I don't really think people's curiosity is just cause to violate her privacy. It's entirely up to her to decide to share that information or not.
I don't understand people's fascination with it. I'm fairly indifferent about people's genders or sexual preferences in general. You make the choice that suits you best, I'll do the same for me. If you want to be called he/she/they/whatever, then fine, that's cool. I'll do my best to respect your wish to be referred to by a particular title/pronoun. It makes no difference to me.
I'm also pretty indifferent about how people refer to me. Call me sir, miss, he, she, they, them, "hey you".... I don't honestly care. I'm fine with gender normative terms and that's what I tell people that I "prefer" but honestly, I could not care any less. I usually avoid gendered terms as much as I can when I'm in someone's presence; I'm also bad with names, so I usually just use personal direct pronouns such as "you". I try my best to side step the whole issue because it's trivial in my mind. I won't fault someone for caring about it, the same way I don't care if someone gets my name wrong, or says it differently. I don't care enough to correct them, and I don't care that it's wrong unless they need to enter my legal name into a thing for something, which is when it actually matters, legally, so I'll correct them at that point. The only other correction I'll make is to avoid confusion with coworkers. I work with some people who have similar sounding names to mine, so I'll correct clients and co-workers so that I'm not conflated with them (and I don't take flack for something they did, and they don't take flack for something I've done, etc). Beyond that, I couldn't care less. At the same time, people have gotten angry with me for pronouncing their name slightly wrong, so I know people are out there with very strong opinions on it.
Maybe I'm weird. Who knows. There's just so many more important things in the world than what people call me that I'm just consistently unbothered by people getting it wrong.
All I did was look at "leave Brittany alone" on google and then click wikipedia. Everything I shared here is public info and thus I didnt invade anyones privacy? This comment chain has been fairly low importance/care, I dont think any of here care about her gender all that much more than you do. The last few comments where just about the awkward nature of potentially misgendering someone by accident
Yeah, I agree, this chain has mostly been about the awkward parts of it. I didn't mean to imply you invaded her privacy, someone may have in the pursuit of the information, but I certainly didn't mean to imply that was you.
Regardless, whether her privacy was invaded or not, the information is now out there about her, and that is what I had assumed you were referring to. The misunderstanding stems from my comments; specifically that when such a question is raised, some may seek that information quite enthusiastically, even if obtaining it means that you're invading their privacy. I don't know if that's what occurred, but the fervent pursuit of relatively trivial information, damaging someone's right to privacy in the process is questionable at best. I'm just trying to make a comment on the ethics and morals of those that desire information for no better reason than to have it about someone they don't even know.
I would rather not think that people would simply disregard her rights just to have a trivial question answered, but I don't have that much faith in humanity.
I'm certain you're fine and you've done nothing wrong in this instance. I apologize if my words implied any differently. That was not my intention.
I hope you have a wonderful day.
Thats fair enough and a valid point! I do have a tendency to use the internet to double check facts, but in cases such that it might intrude on privacy, I try to keep it to a basic search so that I can minimize that risk. In this case it was just confusion on the presenting gender of a person from a meme, and so I double checked if I was the one in the wrong, turns out I was right in a way I wasnt expecting. I hope you have a pleasant day as well!