this post was submitted on 25 Jan 2024
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[–] [email protected] 34 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

False. The correct way to sleep is on a 7-11 sausage roller set to high speed.

  • The heat lamp creates warmth which you normally substitute with a dangerous choking blanket
  • the high-speed spinning flings off your sweat to keep you cool using Bernoulli's Principle instead of energy-hungry and dangerous fans or AC units
  • the constant flow of vomit and other effluvia helps you maintain a healthy figure instead of ridiculously augmenting your life with the high-risk activity of "exercise."