this post was submitted on 19 Nov 2023
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I have come across a lot's of people like these. like 99% of them. Sometimes it makes me think twice if what i am saying is wrong? What's wrong with them. Is it so hard to swallow your pride and acknowledge that the other person is speaking facts? When they come to know they are wrong they proceed to insult/make fun of others to save their ass. Just why?

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

Because people tie their egos to their opinions and beliefs. They see an attack on those as an attack on their person.

We are all like this to certain extents. For example, I am a firm believer of the right of the individual to make their own choices, and believe that attempts to remove a person's right to make choices morally abhorrent.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

It's a basic psychological need to be able to trust that your brain can be right. A lot of psychological problems can result if you don't trust your own brain to be able to solve problems and cope with new information.

Some people don't learn the value of accepting mistakes/failure as part of learning. As a result, they will associate being wrong with weakening the trust they have in their brain. They don't want to believe that their brain may not come up with answers for the problems and changes they face in life. So they will deny that their brain is incorrect.

It's an ugly insecurity, but it's totally understandable from an evolutionary perspective. We need to be able to trust our brains to navigate life's challenges. People need to be taught that it's okay to make mistakes, and that admitting when you are wrong is an opportunity for personal growth.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Can you elaborate on what you mean psych problems when you don't trust your brain?

I have memory issues and so when I'm doing something more complex than muscle memory I write it down. So I don't trust myself on specific memory tasks, like phone numbers.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

I'm not a psychologist, so I can't explain the exact theory, but basically my understanding is that self-confidence and self-esteem are linked to the concept of self-efficacy, which means the trust that your mind will be able to cope with the challenges presented to it. Low self-esteem and self-confidence are linked to all kinds of insecurities and challenges functioning.

Disclaimer: I recently began working on my own low self-confidence with my therapist and she pointed me to a book, the contents of which I'm mostly regurgitating here. The book is "The Six Pillars of Self-esteem" by Nathaniel Branden.