this post was submitted on 02 Oct 2023
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I recently moved to the USA, from the middle east. My English is pretty good, and I don't have a lot of trouble communicating with people at work or in stores. I also don't know anyone here at all, outside of work. All my family is still back in Gaza, and I've been here over a year now, and still feel cut off from American people and culture.

How do you make friends and socialize here? How do I learn more about America and Americans culture? I know a bit about history, but not much about anything else.
I don't drink or go to bars, for religious reasons. I have joined a couple of clubs based on hobbies, but still feel disconnected. I'm not sure how you socialize or meet new people here, in my family everyone came around your house all the times of the day, and here it seems like neighbors just stick to themselves. I don't want to bug people or anoy them if that is not the customs here.

Also, what are your favorite parts of American culture and history? So far I have enjoyed Nascar and monster trucks very much, and studying mathematics.

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[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 year ago (8 children)

You mentioned you joined a few clubs. I would say focus on that. As long as you're going out to the same social place every day and doing some activities, you'll be bound to meet friends.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (7 children)

Yes, I have been in a few clubs for about a year, but it seems like people just show up for the meeting an activities, and then leave. It's not what I am used to, where a small thung turns into many days and many people coming by to talk, trade stories... do you talk to the people you meet outside of a group of people? I do not what impose or be rude to people if that is not what is normal here.

[–] breakfastburrito 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I think this is a major culture difference between your home country and US. What you describe is not how people in America socialize. The closest comparison would be college years, where you live in a small walkable town, typically with roommates, and don’t have too many responsibilities. If you want to recreate that then I’d recommend grad school. Or move to Chicago or ny city or small college town. The suburbs is generally where people move to focus on work and family, social lives change to be more around family, neighbors, and their kids school. It will be hard for a young person to make friends there. East coast has a bit more social culture than the rest of the US but it really depends city to city. West coast everyone is nice and relaxed but socially cliquey, it can be impossible to break into a friend group. Midwest everyone is nice but social events are more in the home over meals, more of a family vibe.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I have been looking at some grad schools, to maybe end up with a PhD in mathematics.

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