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Speaking one language that is mildly gendered (English), two that are strongly (and in the case of the second bizarrely!) gendered (French, German) and one that is almost entirely ungendered (Mandarin), I have not found any utility whatsoever in grammatical gender.
I suspect that grammatical gender is just an ur-form of grammatical classifiers that has stuck around for non-useful amounts of time. I suspect this because one of the grammatical "gender" divisions that's in use in many languages isn't masculine/feminine(/neuter) but rather animate/inanimate. So I suspect that grammatical gender was a classification mechanism whose system and utility was distorted into uselessness over the thousands of years of spread and development.
So why do we have classification mechanisms? Well, in Mandarin there's classifier words. (In English too: "a sheet of paper", not "a paper", but it's waaaaaaaaaaaaay stricter in Mandarin.) The classifiers in Mandarin, given the sheer amount of punning potential in oral language, are likely a redundant piece of information to help nail down which specific word you mean in contexts where it might be unclear. For example in a noisy environment, or if someone is speaking unclearly, "paper" (纸张[zhǐ zhāng]) might be confused with "spider" (蜘蛛 [zhī zhū]). But if I say 一只蜘蛛 [yī zhī zhī zhū]—a spider—it's harder to confuse that with 一张纸张 [yī zhāng zhǐ zhāng]—a piece of paper.
So I'm positing that perhaps at some point grammatical gender was used as a primitive form of classification for disambiguation that some languages just never grew out of. Which is why in German men are masculine, women are feminine, boys are masculine, and girls are neuter. It has nothing to do with actual physical gender and is just a weird, atrophied, and somewhat useless remnant of language.
Thanks for the explanation!
If I may, what do you mean by English being mildly gendered?
English has gendered pronouns, for example. There's also some gender divides in nouns: actor/actress, for example. (These are slowly being replaced, however.)
Languages like Farsi and Mandarin and such don't. The only difference in pronouns, in fact, with Farsi is "courteous" vs. "common". And even that isn't happening as much as it used to. And the only time nouns are gendered is if the item they're talking about has an actual physical gender. Like "man" or "woman". There are no gendered declensions of any kind, in fact.
It's more complicated in Chinese. In oral Chinese there's no gendered pronouns. It's pronounced [tā] whether you mean man, woman, or other.^1^ As with Farsi, however, there are no gendered nouns outside of those describing literal physically-gendered things. And unlike Farsi, not only are there no gendered declensions of any kind, there are hardly any declensions of any kind^2^.
^1^ In written Chinese, for complicated reasons, there are three different pronouns in common usage: 他 for masculine (he), 她 for feminine (she), and 它 for everything else (it). This "modernization" was first proposed in the very late 19th century and came into its final form sometime in the 1920s. It was a deliberate attempt to make Chinese easier to translate into western languages (and since at the time the Chinese had somewhat of an inferiority complex it was also couched as making Chinese a "modern" language). (There were a couple of others added, including one for deities and one for animals, but those never caught on and are hardly ever seen in modern Chinese.)
But they're all pronounced the same: [tā].
And now, full circle, Chinese is "modernizing" again. While official laws, forms, scholarly papers, regulations, etc. use that three-way split in pronouns, increasingly in commercial settings (like the world's largest digital souq: Taobao) all pronouns are being replaced with "TA". Yes. Latin letters. Uppercased.
This I find completely hilarious: Chinese developed gendered pronouns (in writing only!) to soothe western tastes ... only to pick up an ungendered pronoun again ... to match western tastes. And before westerners have solved the problem themselves in their own languages!
^2^ Chinese does not decline for number except for a tiny handful of cases you can learn completely in 30 minutes. (And even here it's not quite 'declension' like that word applies in the Indo-European family of languages.) There's no "car" vs. "cars". They're both 汽车. If you want to specify that you mean more than one car, you would modify it by saying "some" or "three" or whatever in front of it: 一些汽车 [yī xiē qì chē], literally "one (small number) car" or "some cars".
Thanks for the very educational reply! If you have some blogs or something i'd love to hear more analyses on languages like these