this post was submitted on 25 Jun 2025
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Murdered by Words

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Responses that completely destroy the original argument in a way that leaves little to no room for reply - a targeted, well-placed response to another person, organization, or group of people.

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[–] [email protected] 101 points 4 days ago (3 children)

"My mum taught me how to treat a woman" is either dumb or creepy

Approaching and treating others like human beings regardless of their sex and gender? Too much to ask?

[–] zloubida 11 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

Yeah, but we don't educate our children in a cultural vacuum. We have to teach our children to respect everyone, but when we educate boys we have to fight the culture of rape, so we have to be especially attentive to teach boys how to interact with women.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

My point being that you should learn that women just like men are human beings and as such there is no special treatment in the context of the original tweet. The way it's phrased implies that there is a special treatment for women that needs to be learned separately from how to treat men. If the tweet was in the spirit of "she taught me that women should be treated with the same respect as men" I wouldn't have made my remark.

[–] zloubida 9 points 3 days ago (1 children)

My point still stands. A general lesson about how to treat other humans is not enough, parents need to teach especially boys how to treat women, because the society will teach otherwise. You don't need to teach that men are humans; unfortunately we have to teach that women are too.

So yes, let's teach our sons how to treat women.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

I think this comment frames it best. Not all "lessons" your children receive can be controlled so you need to make sure to account for the incorrect lessons they'll get from others.

[–] [email protected] 46 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Agree this is way too gendered.

Teach everyone to behave compassionately in relationships, learn to argue, learn to collaborate, learn to cooperate. Good relationship skills are what everyone needs.

The strongly gendered part is the stand against the manosphere and stand against violence/misogyny.

Also, this isn't just about romantic relationship. I would have really appreciated if anyone I looked up to showed me how to connect with fellow guys/peers.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 4 days ago

I agree, kids don't get taught a lot of really important social skills (regardless of gender.) A lot of parents seem to think that just putting their kid around other kids is going to magically teach them social skills. I admit, growing up with undiagnosed autism may have me biased here, but I also work with autistic kids and part of my job is to teach them social skills. Not every child has this resource, and although I do my best to guide the little ones I work with, I know that even neurotypical kids are thrown to the wilds, by parents who refuse to intervene in issues because "they have to figure it out themselves."

To a degree, I get it - kids need to learn how to solve their own problems independently, especially as they get older. But if parents don't provide any structure at all when a kid is young, where are the kids going to learn from? Other kids. Other kids who likely also haven't been given sufficient guidance on how to problem-solve social issues.

We need to do better for our children. We need to reinforce pro-social behavior whenever possible. I don't wait for my (work) kids to independently share their toys, but when another kid plays with something my kid really likes, I get ahead of potential issues by telling my kid, "I love how you're sharing your music box with so-and-so!" It makes a big difference in how they react, and goes to show that providing a bit of proactive praise now and then can go a long way toward building good social habits.