this post was submitted on 11 Feb 2025
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unix_surrealism
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one should not chase the electric dream
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"I need help" was one of the earliest things mom taught me to say to other people.
Of course people mocking one for needing help/not knowing something made that really unpleasant and wish humans were less....humany sometimes.
Girl doesn't have very many human friends though.
Maybe she'll get the help she needs then, without humans being weird! Hopefully!
persevering through the negatively is one of the hardest lesson I've learned when being mocked for something I do not know. eventually, the right people will begin to gravitate towards this way of thinking, will hang around you more and your life begins to improve.
I know it worked for me!
Especially as those mocking people just read an article a few days ago and remembered it, but never really put a thought into it themselves
When I ask for help or say I don't understand it, it often doesn't mean, that I don't know the rough concept, but that I haven't had the time to go through it in detail, so I can integrate it in the complete system in my mind
So, as long as I can't really understand how it's doing what it's doing, I don't really know about it imho
By now I've understood the people brag with stuff they don't understand themselves. So sometimes I can just counter with detailed questions and they shut up, because they never thought about it.
Even more nerve wracking are the people just relying on words you don't know.
I'm since decades working as a SW Dev, but I've never finished university. So I usually know my way around and know concepts, but sometimes I don't know the academical terms for things.
Always led to me being silent and needing to lookup said words afterwards, just to discover that it's a known (and often easy) concept, but they make a dick comparing contest out of it.
By now I'm in a position (mentally and professionally), that I'm looked down anymore, when I ask for clarification, but took me quite some while to work up the courage - and I think the social position one is in, also sadly plays a major role
All in all, yeah, I had such people and the thing is, they're always insecure and just want to prematurely defend themselves, to cover themselves, so to say.
(Was written a bit non sober on the phone, hope it makes sense ;-))