Technology

requires it to also impair your daily life and functioning or cause discomfort or pain

According to this article, LGBTQIA+ people experience:

• 2.5x higher rates of depression, substance abuse, and anxiety
• higher rates of discrimination - article claims 70%
• shame and self-doubt - no numbers given, but 43% of youths are kicked out of homes due to lack of acceptance, which certainly contributes

That's a lot of discomfort, impairment to daily life, etc. Yes, this largely comes from external stimuli, but that's also largely true for people with lower intelligence (i.e. won't be considered for better jobs they could do due to discrimination). Some of it is also internally sourced (why am I different from my peers? What's wrong with me??), especially for people experiencing gender dysphoria (why doesn't my body match how I feel?).

AFAIK, we don't have a link between genetics and LGBTQIA+ people like we have for something like handedness or intelligence (jury is out on the latter for how much it contributes though). Research is obviously ongoing though, which is why it's important to keep the discussion open. Our determination of disorder vs unique trait is pretty arbitrary, so I think it's important to keep the discussion open around it.

That said, my overall point here is that the label itself doesn't really matter. People will discriminate against those who are different from them regardless of the terminology we use. The focus should be on that discrimination and intolerance, not on tweaking the terminology we use. We should be considering people who are LGBTQIA+ the same way as people with anything else that needs adjustments to social behavior (left-handed gloves/scissors, wheelchair ramps, interpreters, etc). In most cases, it means not doing anything different, as in not telling someone they can't use a given restroom, or that certain (otherwise sufficiently modest) clothing is unacceptable to wear at school.

IMO, the fight over the words we use distracts from the more important issue of protecting individuals from harassment. As long as social media moderation accomplishes that, it doesn't really matter what form it takes.