Uplifting News
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Y'all damn coastals with yer big fancy oceans. WE GOT OCEANS TOO WE JUST KEEP EM UNDERGROUND SO THEY DON'T SCARE MEEMAW.
Everybody knows meemaw's ascared of the deep water. And when she gets agitated she gets to her whippin stick.
Genuinely LOL'd at your post.
But, to rebuff in some joking annoying science nerd way with a bummer fact:
YOU HAVE NO OCEANS ANYMORE. You used them all up growing corn for moonshine!
IS going to run out of water. Not HAS run out of water.
And we know. We been warning yall fucks for years that the aquifer ain't filling back up and gotdangit they just keep paying us to grow corn on land that ain't suited for growing beans. And everybody knows corn and sorghum ain't no good for the soil neither.
Joking aside, we'll deal with that impending apocalypse like we'll deal with all the other ones. By pretending it isn't happening.
Nebraska goes, "gol' durn it! We want our water from the Platte River! It's ours! We're going to war with Colorado!"
Colorado goes, "Yeah, so water rarely makes it that far anymore, good luck, gg no re."
New Mexico is like, "Yeah, all our Ogallala wells pump brine now."
Reminds me, some of the worst drinking water I have had in my life came from those dust bowl states.
You ever read the water history stuff where back in the (I believe) 1950s, there was a plan to build 6 nuclear reactors to power a pump/pipe system to pipe Mississippi River water up to New Mexico? They decided against it, and decided, "eh, that water will run out in 50 or so years, we'll let future us worry about that." Checks calendar.