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I don't know much about Dendrite, but maybe you want to add which client on what kind of device you're using... Computer or phone is kind of a different story concerning notifications. And on Android it also matters which brand and if you're using an aftermarket OS variant maybe without the Google services... or the stock Android that came with the phone. I'm just asking since we're in a nerd community here...
So sorry my bad!
The device that struggles with push notifications is a pixel 8 with GrapheneOS. Element was installed through f droid.
Also another problem that I have been facing is I cannot multitask while in a call otherwise it cuts my microphone. I have to stay in app to be able to talk with the person I am in the call with.
Notifications work just fine on my desktop running arch.
I will update the post with this information.
Uh, I'm not sure about that setup. Usually F-Droid strip the Google libraries, so you won't get push notifications via whatever the default Google mechanism is. (And I'm not sure if it also requres some setup on the server side.)
And without push notifications, you'll experience severely delayed notifications. I installed ntfy for that. That's an alternative push notification provider. And that works for the F-Droid versions of FluffyChat and Element X and such...
Maybe try the Play-Store version of Element and see if that works. Or install something like ntfy on your phone if you like the F-Droid builds better.
I just installed ntfy and am going to give that a go for a while and report back!
It should automatically add a subscription and show that, after Element picked up on it. Otherwise it won't do anything. I don't remember if I had to do any additional steps.
The mic thing is either a permissions issue, or the client app itself, but doesn't have anything to do with your self-hosted portion.
As for the delays, it sounds like you are only talking about notifications, is that right? Messages in app show up quickly, but notifications are delayed?