this post was submitted on 14 Dec 2024
61 points (95.5% liked)

Mental Health

4298 readers
83 users here now

Welcome!

This is a safe place to discuss, vent, support, and share information about mental health, illness, and wellness.

Thank you for being here. We appreciate who you are today. Please show respect and empathy when making or replying to posts.

The rules for posting and commenting, besides the rules defined here for lemmy.world, are as follows:

Rules

1-Posts promoting paid products and services of any kind are not allowed here.

2-All posts and comments must be helpful and supportive. Do not put vulnerable people at risk.

3-Do not DM or ask to speak privately to any of our members unless they specifically request it.

If a person from this community disturbs you in a comment, please report the comment. If you receive a DM you did not request, send a screenshot of the DM in a message to a moderator. This is a bannable offense.

4-Suicide, Self-Harm, Death-- Extended discussions are STRONGLY DISCOURAGED here. First, mods and community members are caring people, but not experts in crisis situations. Second, we want to avoid Lemmy becoming like many commercial social media platforms, where comments can snowball into counterproductive talk.

If you or someone you know needs more help than can be found here, please refer to the pinned resources.

If BRIEF mention of these topics is an important part of your post, please flag your post as NSFW and include a (trigger warning: suicide, self-harm, death, etc.)in the title so that other readers who may feel triggered can avoid it. Please also include a trigger warning on all comments mentioning these topics in a post that was not already tagged as such.

Partner Communities

- Therapy

Neurodegenerative Disease Support

ADHD

Autism

Fibromyalgia

TMJ

Chronic Pain

Bipolar Disorder

Avoidant Personality Disorder

Friends and Family of People with Addiction

To partner with our community and be included here, you are free to message the current moderators or comment on our pinned post.

Community Moderation

Some moderators are mental health professionals and some are not. All are carefully selected by the moderation team and will be actively monitoring posts and comments. If you are interested in joining the team, you can send a message to ZenGrammy for more information.

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

It is less than a week till Christmas and I still have not gotten anything ordered or anything, I have felt depressed and low energy these pasts couple of months, I cannot even keep up with my house chores which angers my roommates. I don't think they want to hear about my mental health anymore, I think they are gonna be very upset when they bought me thing and I got nothing or just offered cash since I really have no energy to shop for them and I have no idea what to get and this has been a major cause of stress these past couple of weeks on top of non stop work, with only one day off in between. I just feel like I am crashing out and wondering if I should just move out and be homeless since I cannot really be the best roommate right now

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 days ago

For my best friends, there were years when I don't get them a Christmas or birthday gift, but I have just got them something I think they needed at some random point when I saw them, and was like, "here, your birthday/Christmas gift, whatever".

I do think you should do your chores, but I get it that it's not easy as that. As a former roommate who did the most cleaning up after all four others, this would bring far more joy to me than receiving a gift in return for me giving one. It might make you feel a little less miserable to get something done.

If your roommates are really expecting money or something in return for the gift, in my eyes (tax law is a different matter), that's a sale or a trade, not a gift. It is and should be out of generosity, and whatever you get or give should be in that spirit rather than obligation imo. If you feel shame and feel obliged but need ideas, why don't you order a nice meal for everyone, booking a spot at a restautant for whoever's schedules align or you have it delivered to your place for them as the gift? Alternatively, gift cards for a place you knkw they like to go is a super simple option.

Listen, it's not the end of the world if you can't get a gift for Christmas in time. No need to move out over it. Work is hard enough. Don't put yourself through more unhealthy stress just because of capitalistic cultural brainwashing to get you to spend money.