this post was submitted on 03 Nov 2024
89 points (98.9% liked)
Asklemmy
43978 readers
571 users here now
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
Search asklemmy ๐
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
- Open-ended question
- Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
- Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
- Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
- An actual topic of discussion
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
- Lemmyverse: community search
- sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
- [email protected]: a community for finding communities
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_[email protected]~
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
What does she do when she is doing herself? And is she getting orgasm that way, and is she getting it with you in any way?
If she can do direct clitoral stimulation for herself, it's possible you are just too rough, a lot of guys are. But also possible that she's just wired so that direct contact is unpleasant.
It's hard to recommend without more information but I would suggest a tight angle face to face, that she might be able to sort of grind on you while fucking, to get some vulva stimulation and the inside feeling, that might push her over. Also maybe try playing with her boobs while she's on top.
Mostly I think you are on the right track with the mental angle - engaging the mind, find out what she thinks about and use that, give up your ideas about every woman being wired the same.
And Do Not Push her. Really listen to what she wants.
Thanks, she does not masturbate, so no knowledge source there.
I'll try that position you suggested, sounds very intimate as well.
And I am kind of at a last ditch effort here, I of course accept her as she is, I just want to see if there is something I can do to help her orgasm before I give up on the prospect for now. She is very satisfied with our sex life (so as I) but I really think she might be missing out since she never had an orgasm and so she can't really know what she is missing out on.
Hmm, yes if she does not masturbate I honestly think she might just not be that much into the physical pleasure, you may have to just take what you can get - even though you would be frustrated, she may not be. It's hard for me to imagine, too! But if she enjoys the closeness and seeing you get off, your expectations may be getting in the way.
Even if she gets frustrated, she will probably have to figure out herself what works. It's really good she is not faking, don't push her to the point she feels like that's the answer.
ETA: tight angle with her legs up if she is flexible, or kind of sideways so one of your legs is against her vulva (look up coital alignment technique) those positions with some amount of outside contact like that are very intense dual stimulation, and if you are yourself angled upward the tight angle with legs up will also hit those front areas inside where the nerves from the clitoris run upward.
Don't worry, I would never push her and we are both happy, I am also not frustrated with the situation, just wondering if there is something else I can try
my partner just want cuddles.
I like eating peaches!
We are not the same.