this post was submitted on 13 Aug 2024
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ADHD
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It's depressing to hear most people say medication helped them the most. I'm still on a waiting list. Failing my college, work and life.
Even after I became aware that I have ADHD in my 40s, additional years were still wasted after not getting treatment, with lost jobs, money etc.
Sitting on a referral from the GP for 18 months now, and they don't even give me an appointment in a distant future. The only thing that worked for me in my 20s: Set the bar low enough. Stop "planning" to study for 3 hours "tomorrow", or half-assing 2 hours while a video plays, you are on the phone and get coffee 5 times. Instead, admit that you'll only get 25 minutes in. But do them today, completely focussed, no distractions, not even getting water, no toilet break etc.
Think of it like squid game. The team that gets the best test score after 25 minutes studying lives. You'd rather pee in your pants than to get up and certainly wouldn't check your phone.
Worked for me, can't say if it will for you.
That's what I've been doing. "Even if it's just 10min, it's 10minutes I've done what I wanted to."
It's unreliable, and works half the time. The harsh approach no longer works. The bar is on the ground. My focus is now on just learning to take care of myself, and that don't go well either.
tbh I wrote a long-ass post bc I saw yours; I also didn’t have meds when I started wrestling all this
I found out too late. I've unknowingly been battling for over a decade, and yet only now I understand just how insignificant my progress really is.
I get how you feel that, but I can’t agree. Knowing who we are is real, tangible progress. Ages of people like us died never having the words we’re able to use now. You’re still alive, and you’re trying, and you’re getting somewhere.
It’s not too late.
Fuck off with that mindless positivity bullshit. I've tried my hardest and have gotten nowhere. I've failed college once and am failing it twice. I haven't got any useful skills and I'm bad at the best job I've ever had. You are either lucky you're not half as retarded as some of us, or simply ignorant of how debilitating ADHD can be.
Oof. Not a good look
Shou I get your point but I agree with beefbot Im sure you havnt tried everything...
When you know something doesnt work, the benefit is that you know to try somthing else.
Have you tried Religiously Swimming 5 times a week, combined with light-weight excersize at the gym? Add in solid 8 hours of sleep and noFap... For me its a huge boost in Mood and ADHD...
If not that what about Magic Mushrooms, LSD, Amphetamines?
You were given the gift of life and time for free... So long as you have it you can spend it to correct your problems.
Why assume I haven't done so already?
I used to exercise 3 to 5 times a week depending on how much an old injury allowed me. I did boxing. I love it. It does nothing for my exc. Functioning, nor does it calm my mind after. It took me 3 months of forcing myself before I started to enjoy it. After that, it became easy to go fitness/do boxing. I struggle to keep up as my health detoriates amd energy levels fluctuate.
Chonic stress has taken its toll. I started to suffer from hallucinations and misinterpretations. Which have gotten serious in the past half year. Weed, and psylocibin can worsen this. Makeshift meds are a no go for me. I once bought 1 blunt (hasj), thinking I was stable enouhh to try it. It remains waiting in a drawer for god knows how long. I already have an addiction to gaming which is hard to beat. I don't need a second one.
I sleep a lot more than the average person. If I can fit a nap during break, I savour every minute. I keep to 6-22 day rythmn. If I need more sleep, I go to bed earlier and stay in longer. The perks of being an early bird. I rarely stay up past 22.00.
I beat depression once. Properly so. Trying everything and accepting every bad and good change during remission. After two years, developed a "will" of my own after not having experienced it in 13-14 years or so.
Then I hit that ADHD wall again and lost my future. Having to give up on my aspirations once more. Because I am too retarded for society. For the work I wished to do. This is the 3rd time I have to face the facts.
My parents both considered abortion. But my mother, whom I got ADHD from, thought girls couldn't get it. So she kept me. She didn't want a child, she wanted a solution to her loneliness. Both my parents were neglectful and my mother was abusive and controlling.
I've been spending years not just fixing my own problems, but now of my infantile parents too. My sister and I raised ourselves.
So tell me. How is life a gift when you're disabled? When your family is an assembly of autists? How does the path of healing look like, when whatever brain part needs to heal never properly developed to begin with? Have you tried navigating that yet?