this post was submitted on 15 May 2024
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When I first moved in, I thought the housemate was a little stuck up and a bit out of touch, but when we started speaking more I realised that we've actually had quite similar lives and we get along really really well. He didn't grow up in the system, but he still got to "enjoy" a lot of the same things I did. Moving around a lot, changing schools more than yearly, etc etc. And knowing that he's managed to get through it actually helped a lot with some of my deep seated fears about the future.
These days we pretty much just talk shit about the system and people in the department, but it's always nice talking to him. It's a massive shame he's moving out so soon, but he's been here for longer than I was at the last place, so I can't fault him for wanting to move on. If I was in his shoes I would too. I hope the next LT/mentor they've lined up is as easy to talk to and get along with
I went to eight primary/high schools and have lived at around 35 different places, the longest for eight years (where I was born).
I'm having trouble remembering every school I've been to, but I've been to at least 10 (+1 kindergarten, if you count that). I think you have me beat on houses, I've been in 20 or so
@Baku @Seagoon_
If you don't mind me asking, what (broadly speaking) are your respective backgrounds that led to you both moving round a lot and changing schools >yearly etc?
I'm not gonna go into details about the housemates situation because it's not my place, but I moved around a lot mostly because of affordability. My mum was disabled, but according to Centrelink not disabled enough for the DSP, so we were just on regular jobseeker/family benefits. We lived in outer Melbourne (which would've probably been classified as country at the time) when I was born, but the landlord tried to double the rents when I was born on account of "children = mess", which was probably illegal but whatever. We lived in a decent sized country town for a couple of years, but moved because of rents and such.
We moved again to an absolutely tiny country town, but eventually the landlord decided to sell the house. This was the case with the next house, too. Probably went up for sale as some sort of attempt to bypass tenant protections, as the houses were both dumps and sold extremely cheaply, even for the time. The next house we moved because of extremely abusive neighbours. Next house was an emergency house for families facing homelessness, which we were only in for a couple of months. Then we moved to a housing commission flat (still in the country).
Then I ended up in foster care with an abusive carer, so eventually the placement broke down and I was removed and placed in kinship with a family friend. Then I went back home. Then a couple years later I ended up in state care, was bounced to an emergency foster carer a fair ways away, then a few days later went to a contingency but slightly longer term foster carer place. Then a few weeks later I was moved into a contingency residential care house which was converted from a residential aged care place, they "matched" me to a "long term" Resi in the same town my mum was living in a few months later, but that broke down a couple days in and I was kicked out. They sent me a few hundred KMs into the city where I was placed in 2 different hotels. Then eventually I was moved into a long term contingency residential placement, then they finally matched me to the one I was in last. I did a 4 year stint there and Eve tually transitioned into a lead tenant placement (mostly independent living, but still under the purview of child protection) where I currently am.
The longest I've ever lived at 1 house was at my last residential placement where I was for 4 years. School wise, I was still in primary school when I entered the last place which I moved to midway through year 6. Then I bounced between 3 different high schools while I was there. First I was at a flexible high school 30 mins away, but I left due to an incident that occured. I did school online for a while post COVID, but that broke down because they didn't suit my needs, and then to an alternative school. Averaged out, I've changed schools something like every 9 months. But at a number of my state care placements, I hadn't even been there long enough to be enrolled in a school. I've never stayed at one school for more than a year and a half or so (maybe 2, I'm having trouble remembering the dates from a couple of them)
@Baku woah that's an interesting backstory thanks. I was thinking like "me=unstable parents, him=military parents" level of detail lol.
I was asking coz I've noticed that I (child of hippies, always movin') have a lot in common with children of military folks (always posted elsewhere, always movin'), and wondered if you'd hit a parallel dynamic.
Thanks for sharing your story. I've got some similarities, but I think it's really good you've got some stability at the moment.
It's hard to give advice without sounding like a fuck knuckle, but if I can say this:
There are really good people out there. People that you might think of as family. It doesn't always help ease the ache of what's missing, but give it a chance.
Sorry if that comes across oddly. It's just been my experience as someone who had no one from age 14 onwards.