this post was submitted on 10 May 2024
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[–] [email protected] 14 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Meh, my cousin didn't have his first kid until he was in his 40s, ya got plenty of time to figure out, for example, if you even want a partner and kids, or if you just see those as milestones ya gotta tap to not disappoint people around you.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (2 children)

I had kids young, cause the last thing I want is to be raising teenagers in my 50s. By then my kids will be on their own and the wife and I can enjoy the hell out of our child free life when we have more wisdom and money

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I mean my parents raised me and my sibling when they were that much older and I'd say the two of us are a sight more well adjusted than a significant number of highschool sweetheart honeymoon babies that are running around.

The point is that it's not the age, it's the character of the parent that matters most.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

Of course, but it doesn't mean a 25 year old isn't gonna be a good parent. My mom had me when she was 17 and she's an incredible mom, her and my dad are still together 40 years later.

Meanwhile my wife's parents had her when they were in their 40s and to this day they're the most immature shit parents I know

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Statements like this make me believe a lot of people have kids because it’s some item they can check off their list to live up to what society expects from you. Why even have kids if that’s your mentality?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

Who says I didn't want my kids? I did, I love em. But we all decide when we want em. I decided I wanted them young, when I have energy and time to give them. I kinda think having kids old is irresponsible and not great health wise

[–] [email protected] 0 points 5 months ago

I agree with you, and I’m somebody who wanted to be a parent more than anything and now love being a parent. The whole issue of living up to what’s expected of you rather than what matters to you, is pretty pervasive IMO.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

I had a boss who got married when he was 40 as well. Same as others, I'm also unmarried and in early 30s, but I don't feel the need to keep up with the Joneses either. I still have many things to do before I feel the need to settle down. There are plenty of people who marry late and don't regret it. It's best to figure out first what you want before jumping the gun, simply for the sake of social conformance and then regret it. I'm sure we know of people regretting marrying early, or stick to an unhappy marriage out of insecurity or for whatever reason.