this post was submitted on 10 Jul 2023
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Dating, Relationship Advice, Personals

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I've actually been wondering about this for a while. Realised this is a really good place to ask!

So when you're dating someone in Malaysia. How often do you like to check in with your partner? How much is too much or too little?

I'm a pretty independent nyet so once every couple days feels about right for me. And maybe share some funny link if it pops up. Any more and I start feeling this slightly smothering obligation hanging in the air. But I've heard a pretty wide range on what people think is normal / makes them insecure. Like some couples wish each other good morning and good night every single day kinda thing. (But also some couples wear 100% matching outfits when they go out. Pls just let me die instead)

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[โ€“] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Don't have a partner atm, but if I am dating someone, I don't mind checking in a couple of times a day, but two things:

  • my partner shouldn't expect me to reply immediately.
  • checking in should be for a reason (ex: you come across a silly dad joke and you want to share), for instance the daily good morning/good night would eventually feel like a chore to me in the long run, like a list of things you need to tick off on a checklist.
[โ€“] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

That seems pretty reasonable, the obligation / chore bit defo gets me

Like I don't mind if chat happens organically. But this feeling of like having to send someone a message every morning and night for life or they get unhappy is like ahhh bruh give me space to breathe