I have wrinkles, I have grey hair, I have back problems, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, I can't remember anything, the world seems confusing and complicated to me now and I wish things were simpler (which is why I like Lemmy). I definitely don't get kids today or their music.
How am I so old?
You purposefully let yourself slip. I'm 41. I listen to new music, I understand kid's clothing styles (I was not that different in the 90s), I've kept up with modern technology, I kept moving (due to my labor intensive job), and I've eaten well. That's all on you bro. Old does not have to mean outdated.
Edit: reminds me of my Dad who pretty much stopped listening to any music produced after 1982 and has his garage radio permanently set to classic rock. I made a promise to myself a long time ago that I will never stagnate like that.
Really look at that computer. The OP is in his fifties. Tell me how you are in 10 years. Hes also exaggerating although you might be recognizing forgetting things or losing track of what your doing at home (For some reason it does not really happen at work I think because of the intense focus and all sorts of time management tools we have. Im not checking a calendar constantly at home or devops software). Some of his stuff is not even problems. I listen to music and bands that are before my time and have done so since I was young. He probably should do something about his blood pressure and cholesterol though. I totally wish things were simpler but more because they are annoying than complicated. Many tech things have lost a lot of functionality in the modern age as they are dumbed down rather than gaining greater function. It galls me how much I still have to do with paper.
Why does the computer make you conclude OP is in their 50s? OP says in the title that they're 46. I'm 41, and we had this computer at my rural elementary school.