GayBros

I went through your comment history to see if you were a troll (sorry), and I noticed that you said that you haven't used a dating app in 10 years. That would be my suggestion of where to start - use a dating app. Grindr, hornet, scruff, okcupid - doesn't matter.

Just talk to people. It always made me feel better. Use a normal, undoctored photo from a normal angle. Somebody will be interested. We don't sound too dissimilar, looks-wise, and I was constantly surprised by how much attention I got. (Little note here: When writing your profile, focus on mentioning what you like instead of what you don't like in a potential mate. You catch more flies with honey than vinegar, you know?)

And just be honest about your virginity. I had a friend who was a virgin until he was 28 - didn't even know he was gay until then either. It happens. People understand. And don't worry about the small dick thing, especially if you're wanting to bottom. It's probably more average than you realize, once you get out there and see a bunch of them.

There's a much smaller chance of getting STDs from hand and mouth stuff, so just tell people you don't do anal until you've gotten to know someone well enough to trust them. Heck, I used to say that. I think it's generally a good practice.

And perhaps you should be ready to lower your standards a bit. I don't have a lot of advise here except to say that mine were always pretty low and that has gotten me laid on several occasions.

But yeah feel free to message me if you need someone to talk to. Can't guarantee I'll respond quickly.

Everbody worth being loved and treated with respect. As far as I can see, you neither Love yourself nor give yourself the respect you deserve. Be kind to yourself and stop hurting you. Find a therapist and start solving your issues with selfharm, selfesteem and social anxiaty. Ist better invested money than buying a sexy twink for one night.

someone out there will fuck you guaranteed. If you're only on grindr, try switching to a different app like growlr that specifically caters to bigger guys and chasers.

It sounds like you're being super hard on yourself and you're probably not as bad off as you feel

I have paid for escorts before when I was insecure about being gay, my body, sex, etc. Usually they are very strict in regards to protection, so I didnt get any STD from them. I dont regret the times I did it, for me it was money well spent. I didnt do it a lot. Usually masturbation and self-play would be enough for me, but there were some times where I really needed to have some body contact. I would say, if you have the money to do it and it is something you really want to do, then just try it once. Maybe youll love it or maybe youll hate it.

On the other hand, you are being to harsh in yourself!! You have to learn to love yourself and work on the things that can be worked. I know its hard as F, but start small and keep doing it!