this post was submitted on 20 Oct 2023
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Autism

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It's a medium article about infighting that I often see in autistic communities.

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I am kinda old, I got my diagnosis late because when I was in grade school, no one talked about autism, I was just "special" I was passed grade to grade because I would "catch up eventually" I grew up through a lot of change, I saw the LGBTQIA+ community go through something very similar to this. When we were allowed to "come out" and be less scared the community was so tribal. The gay men didn't want the lesbians around and vice versa, no one believed bisexuals existed, and you were only transexual on the weekends to make money. Or that was the thinking then.

Now we, for the most part, see the value of working together, the strength in numbers, we have shed some of the internalized homophobia and found a collective voice to fight against the attacks from the outside and stop perpetuating them internally.

This seems the same tribalism we are seeing in the nurodivergent world right now. There will be a time to come together, and fight the attacks from the outside, a time to raise our voice together and protect our own, but for now, each individual that see this as problematic must begin the cry to end the infighting and strengthen our group and show what we can do collectively.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This is insanely important information! Thank you! I was asking myself the exact same thing as op and I even made a couple groups myself just to see them fail. Your account was most helpful. Thank you.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I hope this broken tribe mentality clears in this community much more quickly than it has in the LGBTQIA+ community. I wouldn't say we are done with it yet there are so many in the gay community that still want to exclude parts for what seems like bigotry. There are necessary executions simply for the protection of others, but consenting adults and all that.

Back on track, the sooner this community (nurodivergent, autistic, whatever you want to call it) would be wise to take a lesson from us. There are many who are of both communities, so I have hope. We need people like you, me and others that see this and think the in-fights are a problem to calmly, rationally educate, point to the past, and lead by example.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You are absolutely correct. Well, the first step would be that you and I (and maybe pp?) make a community on lemmy searching for exactly these people (to organize) and educate the rest. What do you say?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I had not thought about this, it sounds like a great idea, but I need a little time to think and plan a bit of that is okay, in the meantime feel free to dm and chat a bit and let me know what you have in mind.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (2 children)

The author acknowledges that if you know one autistic, you know one autistic - just like with neurotypical people - and then proceeds to call for us to become one bloc where everyone loves everyone else.

It's not gonna happen, for the simple reason thät autistics are so diverse. We all know that. It's the same as asking for all humans to hug and get along because we're all humans.

It's one thing to long to be accepted, but another to expect it to happen without a healthy pre-selection. Find the right people and they will accept you. Cast your net to wide and you will be disappointed.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

When forcing people into one bloc was the problem in the first place.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

@avalokitesha @pavnilschanda
I’m not good at teams, either. By not good, i mean, really suck at it.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

I think it's ok for there to be breakaway communities establishing themselves. We all grow up in different ways and come from various cultures, and in combination with "monotropism" it's unlikely we will all view things from the same page.

It can however lead to what the author describes as "going off the deep end". As sad as that is though, mental health is a challenging thing, and especially for us neurodivergents it can be an uphill battle depending on where you are in life and what experiences you have been through.

I would love a utopia where we could all get along, respecting differing opinions and perspectives, particularly where they clash with staunchly held beliefs