this post was submitted on 02 Jul 2023
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This is completely strange, and very long. I've exhausted all my ideas, and need fresh ones.

Some background.

  1. my neighbor is old, very very old. Also, they are not very mobile. So something like creeping up to the window and listening in is out of the question. Although, a very long time ago (decades) they did used to hang out near an air condition vent, listening to our in person conversations.
  2. when I say neighbor, I mean they live in a small house connected by a breezeway to my house. I do admit they are rather close. Yes I do have access to thier house.
  3. i have no real idea of thier level of technological expertise. They are pretty manipulative so even though I'm under the impression they're very limited on expertise, it's possible they know more than they let on. Let's just say at this point, they say they have difficulties placing calls to thier saved contacts on thier jitterbug flip phone, but when your not looking they're already on the line with someone, like five seconds after you walked out the door. As far as we know they do not have access to the internet, but who knows. They do know how to navigate to at least a limited number of websites though. (Slight fear of them seeing this post, haha)
  4. they digest far right media. This in itself doesnt seem relavent, but I suppose, in my head, this might be able to give them awareness of the types of technology that one might use to pull something like this off.
  5. It is remotely possible that someone could have installed something inside the house maybe about 15-20 years ago, and given the neighbor access to it.
  6. they are on a limited income, and are not independently wealthy. Any technology would have to be no only easy to use, but on the less expensive side as well.

So... Maybe about once a year for the past few years a topic or phrase that was talked about over the phone would come up in conversation the next day. Not a big deal, written off as coincidence. That's just how it goes sometimes. Well now, we've had a falling out. For the past few weeks they have brought up many private conversations I have had over my cell phone with at least 2 different people. They repeat not just what I say, but what the person on the other end of the phone says as well. I say, "Man, im pretty sure they're hearing my phone calls." The other person says, "Maybe there's a bug somewhere." The next day they start to prattle on about...a bug on the wall. But not a real bug...oh what do you call those things...you know, bugs that know things. Or I say "I'm worried about this escalating." The other person jokingly says "Oh, don't eat or drink anything from them, unless they take some first.. They may try to kill you." The next day neighbor is handing me a concoction they've made. "Oh, I've just sat down with this mixture I've created for my health. Everything I put in it is sitting on the counter there. (Cue various herbal supplements / tinctures) here have the first sip... it's not going to kill you." They are bringing up / creating situations centered around private converstaions from the night before. They may skip a day or two here and there, but it's a pretty regular occurrence.

Something worth mentioning, is that while im on the phone call, I will turn on my Bluetooth and use my earbuds. Everytime the buds connect, the call drops, and we have to call each other back. I figured I was pushing a button wrong or something and hanging up. But since the neighbor has gone somewhere, we have not been able to replicate the situation.

Things we have tried but have since been disproven:

  • At first we thought we were leaving windows open and they could just hear it...but all windows were closed.
  • maybe they can hear through the walls somehow, they are thin. But its never been a thing before. (why would they have to hang out by aforementioned vent, then) We blast the radio real loud and see how much we can hear from neighbors porch. Can't make out exact words and doesn't explain hearing the other person.
  • well thier radio automatically connects to iPhones ( un-updated iphone from the air drop debacle/ f-ed up feature of the radio involving nfc and bluetooth) and it did pair with my phone at some point. Maybe they can the other person over thier radio. But we tried to make it work and just cant replicate it.
  • we've checked obvious places for a walke talkie looking receiver. Nothing.
  • we've used one of those cheap bug detectors off Amazon and checked the house...and the vent. No wires comming out of strange places as far as we can tell.

I'm at my wits end. What could they be using and how can I stop it? It maybe all a coincidence, but then its as much so as Facebook / Google targeted ads that arent listening your conversations. I mean, what, are they an advanced algorithm that can guess what your thinking based on all available data on you?

Help! And thank you for taking the time. Also, sorry about the format / spelling getting all this out on mobile is tough.

TL:DR. My really old neighbor seems to hear my both sides of cell calls to at least 2 different people. Is there simple, rather cheap technology put there that they could be using. And how do i go about finding it / making it stop.

(page 2) 50 comments
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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Bluetooth doesn't make much sense, as you usually only have one device active. But you can easily rule this out: If you have Android for example, long press the Bluetooth button, then check paired devices. Is there any device you don't recognize? Remove it. Done.

Bluetooth is usually encrypted, so if you didn't accidentally pair your device with your neighbor's there is no way they can listen in.

And even more important: Check for carbon monoxide in your home. You might be having health issues and are hallucinating or making things up.

Besides that: It might be possible your neighbor hears you talking on the phone (through the walls for example or with a bug in your home), but there is absolutely no way they'd hear the other side of the conversation. So either your side alone would already give them all the information or something else is up (see above).

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

I have a student that wears Bluetooth hearing aids, other students phones connect to them all the time. Students down the hall will start playing music, and it will take over her hearing aids. Turning all of our Bluetooth to off fixed the problem. None of the devices that connected to her hearing aids was ever paired, they just connected.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Have a phone call about how you're going to kill your nosey neighbour if he listens to your phone calls again

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

What about regular conversations when you are having people over? If it’s not tech/bluetooth related they must be able to hear that too and it must seem to them like a phone call (just 2 people talking)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

They don't hear anything with regular conversation, unless we're outside on the porch.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

It can be trivial for someone motivated to get spying stuff. I've seen posters on lampposts for gps trackers and a friend somehow got a keylogger usb to bust his cheating ex. Maybe he got something a while back to spy on someone else but is too paranoid to get rid of it.

Could also just be that cellphones are pretty loud. I can hear some neighbours in my apartment speaking on their phone when it's quiet.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

I don't have any more helpful advice besides what the others said but I am very interested in hearing how this goes. I hope you can get some peace of mind!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Anecdotal: my neighbors entryway is recessed, and as so happens to be like 20 meters away from a window on the second floor of my house. There's a ton of vegetation between us, but even if people are whispering there - I can hear it like they are right next to me. Especially when they are screaming at their kids to "be quiet"🫠.
It's possible that your neighbor found some spot where sound from your house travels to. Do you normally take phone calls in a specific area of the house? Vs where you usually have guests over?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

How about talking about some major crimes until the police gets involved. In this case your neighbor himself may call the cops and tell them he is listening to your calls…

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I’m certainly no expert, and maybe there’s a reason no one else has suggested this, but I think we need to consider if this is a paranoid delusion. Maybe speak to a doctor?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Does your neighbor use a hearing aid? It wouldn't surprise me. These devices can connect to Bluetooth. I would take the advice already posted about resetting the Bluetooth connections to your phone.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

@Aviandelight

I immediately thought of a hearing aid too. I'm not sure of what tech they use these days but RF interference can do weird things.

@FarFarAway

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

I too was about to suggest the neighbor has Bluetooth hearing aids. A family member has Bluetooth hearing aids and you can never tell they have them.

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