this post was submitted on 28 May 2025
232 points (99.6% liked)

LinkedinLunatics

4549 readers
464 users here now

A place to post ridiculous posts from linkedIn.com

(Full transparency.. a mod for this sub happens to work there.. but that doesn't influence his moderation or laughter at a lot of posts.)

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 22 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] not_so_handsome_jack 91 points 2 days ago (1 children)

This is actually kind of a great shit post, I love it.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

It's borderline inspirational. It almost makes me want to make a linkedin account just to riff on this for every mundane aspect of my life. I mean I don't have anything as impressive as a top-25 spot on a Clash of Clans leaderboard, but just because I can't compete with this guy doesn't mean I'm unhirable.

First draft for a pitch:

Hey hiring managers, have you ever had to deal with ungrateful employees who incessantly whine about needing "sick time" for imaginary problems like "food poisoning"? We've all been there. What you need is a guy who is still in sepsis recovery and can barely function day to day to help them realize how good they have it.

Due to supply-and-demand, you should be ready to make a highly competitive offer. Hourly wages are acceptable with overtime pay over forty hours, and under the agreement that I will be on-the-clock for every hour which I spend recovering from sepsis, which is all of them.

[–] [email protected] 56 points 2 days ago (2 children)

By that logic Rimworld experience should make you CEO

[–] [email protected] 52 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Studying EVE Online was enough to make someone a finance minister.

[–] not_so_handsome_jack 19 points 2 days ago (1 children)

A good friend of mine described EVE as a spreadsheet simulator, and I think that's really quite beautiful.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago

Most space Sims are.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 days ago

Oh yeah I've heard that. That's wild

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 days ago (1 children)

"Hey, boss. Word is one of our competitors is planning a hostile takeover, what's the plan?"

"Turn them into rations and leather dusters."

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

Exactly its a lil too real 🤣🤣

[–] [email protected] 44 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Tbh after working for decades in the corporate world, I see SIGNIFICANTLY more similarities between that and a fucking game... Or jr high drama, than I do w/ academia.

Capitalism is a fucking joke and anyone who doesn't understand it's a stupid game is delusional

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Capitalism is a fucking joke and anyone who doesn't understand it's a stupid game is delusional

Most people are emotionally invest in the propaganda. unplugging them is matrix level experience that only some people are able to pull off, generally due to some heavy trauma

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago (1 children)

It's like Stockholm syndrome.

Like, yeah, I'm here, I'm in it, I gotta do it so I don't starve or freeze...

But you're never going to get me to say it's a meritocracy. Or efficient.

Some people will though. I think it's less about propeganda than it is about fear. Like if they take Zeus' name in vain they'll catch a lightning bolt.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

Ironically, Stockholm syndrome is named after an event where hostages in a bank robbery were treated with contempt from the police and government. They spent six days having the police point guns at them and the prime minister telling them to be content with dying. The robbers treated them rather well, especially in comparison to the authorities.

Capitalism makes for a much worse captor. I think it has more in common with a cult, constantly spinning a narrative of how it makes your life better and without it you'll live a wretched life. How people outside of it are evil savages, and how they're coming for your peace and quiet. How life under capitalism is the best you can do, even if it isn't perfect.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 days ago

"I would have hired them, but clearly they spend too much time playing Clash of Clans."

[–] RowRowRowYourBot 13 points 2 days ago (1 children)

This suggests poor financial decisions though.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago

I havent played in years, but i had a near max base f2p... i played for like 7 years tho. I had max everything besides walls

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 days ago

He's not wrong. That was one of the most stressful games I've played. So much pressure during a clan war.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I do sometimes joke that in order to hold office you must be able to win a game of Civilization with 2 different victory types.

[–] throwawayacc0430 3 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Domination and Religion then. 😈

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

Another finger on the monkey's paw curls closed :(

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

I mean if you are willing to put yourself through that tedium than sure

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

This seems to be more of a guy looking for work than a CEO lunatic