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Palantir Claims Kids 'Love' Surveillance, According to Forced Data Collection (isglitch.com)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

7 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Privacy advocates alarmed as tech giant launches "Freedom From Freedom" initiative

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

The campaign features testimonials from surveilled students, all delivered under facial recognition monitoring. "The granular behavioral analytics really optimize my recess experience," said one first-grader, as the system flagged her elevated heart rate and automatically enrolled her in Digital Citizenship Enhancement Program.

[–] ohellidk 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

we're pretty much China now :(

Oops forgot that whole site is satire

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Just in case you aren't aware, it's satire. IsGlitch isn't real news.

[–] ohellidk 4 points 1 month ago

Thank god

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

This is satire.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

I've heard all Palantir executives love getting massive wedgies on a daily basis... Like rip the tighties massive.

We should do some thorough validation.

[–] mindbleach 1 points 1 month ago

Better than usual! Still whiffs. Should go:

Kids love surveillance, according to Palantir's hidden cameras