this post was submitted on 21 Jul 2023
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[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Sadly, the older I get the more I see just how badly people suck...including me. I really need to lower my standards.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (2 children)

At this point I'm not sure if it's undiagnosed adhd that makes me socially isolate, or if it's genuinely better just chilling with my wife and her family who are pretty rad compared to everyone else I meet.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

at least you have someone cool and close to you in your life

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

You can be cool by yourself!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

There's a tendency to think social isolation is bad or think something is wrong with us for doing it. IMO most people who go out and party all the time are also just "socially isolating", by putting up a front, drinking etc, with no real deep connection. No vulnerability and openness. If you have deep relationship with family you are probably better off.

Your wisdom could be telling you not to waste your time going out with shallow folks. Having 1 or 2 deep friends is nice.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Obviously, I know absolutely nothing about you, and if your standards are some over the top expectations or demands then you should stop calling them standards.. BUT if your standards are healthy boundaries and some basic safety precautions then by any means try not to mess with them even when the situation is rough — this can burn for a looong time..

[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Weirdo!

But seriously that’s the way it really is. I think we need neighbors as badly as friends these days. It’s those casual second order relationships that contribute to a feeling of community.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Completely agree. I haven't had a beer with a neighbour since I moved to my new appartment. We chit chat in the elevator with some of them, but now I'm just waiting for them to find out I'm in IT and electronics, so I could invite them over to fix whatever 😁.

Hey, it's practically begging, I know, but I actually don't have any more friends. A few died in car accidents, some from heart attacks, some in the pandemic and the rest are abroad 🤷.

[–] bernieecclestoned 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Same, my friends are dying quicker than I can make new ones

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Why do you think I spend my time here, lol 😂.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Full agreement and I think it’s one of the biggest reasons why I need to be involved in communities. “I know you, I like you, but I don’t have the time or energy to hit you up just to chat on purpose, if circumstances change we may become friends” is a really nice relationship to have a lot of.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Being able to say “My man!” to the mailman and have that be that is strangely undervalued. The interaction is positive even if mostly insignificant and that gives a little boost of social confidence.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I realize this is maybe an excuse but it's hard to be friends with my neighbors after learning that they wouldn't wear a mask to save a life.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

@001100010010 Same, I'm always looking for people to talk too.

@cmoney

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

My brain works a lot like a cat. Loudly meow about how badly I need attention, for the first little bit it's the best thing ever, then I hit a moment where I yell STOP and run away.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

EDIT; I forgot this was the internet when I wrote this comment. Hopefully editing helps remove it more thoroughly.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

But it's okay to be friends with people who don't really share your interests. As long as you can still do things together. Taking with people who have different opinions is fun

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

I disagree.

Are we having fun yet??

[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Quite a treasure you have there in that horadric boob

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Awwww, now I'm curious. Did Leoric get surgery?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

When you're neurodiverse and the guy in the top right 🙃

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

I don't need friends, they dissapoint me
strikes pose

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Don't make fun of me like this

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

I relate to this so hard

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's also hard to make enemies as an adult.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Right, the challenge in either case is to get people to pay attention first. Society is dying from indifference not malice.

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