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I needed a "lap desk" or something to put my laptop on, but I wanted it to be low-profile and I could only find a wooden cutting board. Now wooden cutting boards are the only thing I use as lap desks because most actual lap desks I find are super bulky.
I read that as “fap desk” was intrigued then disappointed.
For fap desk you really want silicone
Just cut a hole in the cutting board
That's how you end up getting a cutting board stuck on your dick.