this post was submitted on 14 Feb 2024
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Another night, another fight. I'm almost 100% certain this one wasn't my fault.
Fellow lemmyers (Lemmings?), who the hell do I talk to about problems in my relationship? I can't talk to her about it, because it seems to start fights the second I bring a concern up, and I can't afford therapy right now. I don't want to drag a friend or a coworker into this shit.
To preface, breaking up is not on the table for a fucktonne of different reasons. I believe she will get better, she's just really stressed lately.
I'm going to talk from my experience. First of all I find out if it's me my husband is upset with or someone else. If it's me then I remind him that I'm not the enemy and we need to discuss things in a civilised manner. If it's got nothing to do with me then I let him vent while I listen.
That's appreciated, thank you
My partner and I used to do the "another night, another fight" until I realised the immense stress both of us were under. Not saying where to lay blame, but I changed jobs, she also moved into different industry and haven't seen the same levels of hostility.
Maybe just listen to her for now.
And for you, a diary might be a good idea.
Thank you, I will
Make a throwaway account WITH your partner and put both sides on r/relationship_advice and see what they have to say? Even as a brainstorming idea it'll give you both some outside perspective.