me_irl

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me_irl (lemmy.world)

submitted 9 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

My family has been caring for my bipolar brother on and off for over 20 years since we discovered his mental illness around the age of 18. I wouldn't say it destroyed our family, but it's put us all through an extremely stressful existence--and it's not something we can ever expect a permanent solution for. The toll it's had on my parents is staggering. They've been depressed pretty much since he flew off the handle and it's never really gotten back to 'normal' since.

So yeah, having a kid isn't a guarantee of a happy or purposeful life either. Guess we're just in the 'minority of cases'?

I refuse to bring children into this world for numerous reasons--and that right there is a big one. I don't know if it's genetic, but I'm not taking the risk of bringing another bipolar person to suffer in this world.

[+] Kecessa -15 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

Guess we're just in the 'minority of cases'?

Eh... Yes, as a matter of fact you guys are? Don't know why I need to debate the principle of anecdotal evidences in this discussion 🤔

You could also talk to experts to determine if there's increased risks or not in your specific case. My mother has 6 siblings, one of them had one kid who's schizophrenic, that's one out of 15 kids between my mother and her siblings, nothing hereditary about it (not on our side anyway), shit just happens sometimes.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I've met plenty of others that have seen mental illness wreak havoc on their families. Sure my experience is anecdotal but wtf else can i draw experience from? Make all my decisions based on probabilities and just hope for the best? Congrats on having a bunch of normal functioning family, sounds nice 😊

[–] Kecessa -3 points 9 months ago

wtf else can i draw experience from

Guess you never had stats explained to you?

My first message was general. It doesn't apply to your case? Fair enough, you're in a minority. It doesn't make me wrong and it's not an attack against you and you can push the reflection a bit further and tell yourself "Although it's not the case with me, most people are close to others in their family so I guess in most cases it's a form of support when aging that people don't get if they don't have kids."