this post was submitted on 03 Feb 2024
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askmenover30

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

Yes, but I'm quite a bit over 30. Mid 50s in fact.

It doesn't have to be about conspicuous consumption though. Ours was deliberately a small scale thing: registry office and then a handfasting with a couple of dozen close friends and family in our back garden. The whole thing cost around £1000 and the biggest single expense was hiring the gazebo. My sister catered.

Your family situation sounds very different, but I only invited mine because they were close (my SO went no-contact with hers a long time before).

I was rather surprised to find that I wanted to (get married, that is) - it had not really crossed my mind in my previous long-term relationship - but I found myself wanting to make a bigger commitment this time, and it was all about that commitment to my SO rather than wider family or anyone else. I would still have wanted that regardless of my family situation, I think.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

Your wedding seems to have been a great day.

I definitely get the commitment aspect, but as I said, the main issues for us is having people taking planes to come where we live for the wedding. We both have large families, and it would be nice to have them around for that day, which makes the whole thing a logistical challenge.

What we might do is two smaller scales celebration on each of our sides.