this post was submitted on 30 Jan 2024
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Technology

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[–] [email protected] 59 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I'll implant a bullet in my head before any tech directly touches my neurons.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 6 months ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 55 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (2 children)

Dreams of a cyberpunk future where the sum total of the world's knowledge of any subject can be just a thought away

Most likely reality:

Popup ads are now intrusive thoughts. 40 percent of your implant's processing power is spent looking for cues in your environment to better serve you "curated content" (i.e. advertising). Knowledge is still somewhat freely available but just after this quick shout out to our sponsors.

When you're looking for something specific it's a coin toss whether you get actual knowledge or an AI hallucination and you can't tell the difference. You can pay $279.99/mo for premium access to verified sources, but if your licence expires you forget everything.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 months ago (1 children)

We really appreciate our loyal customers, but starting January 1 2025, We will be introducing a new Premium Plus tier of completely ad-free though with an added 3 human voices for your assistant for only $999.99 per month.

You will get a free week trial, and continue your current subscription at $279.99 per month now supported with ads.

Click here for more information.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

(got an email from google - reCaptcha is now 10,000 hits free rather than a million...)

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago

I'm really high, and I just need you to know you posted good.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 6 months ago (1 children)

You'd be Elon's cyberpunk, though.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago

more like cyberbitch

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Learn some computer security, get yourself a secondhand laptop and a shitty hoodie. There, you're cyberpunk.

No potential brain melting wetware needed.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

Guessing you're not a paraplegic?