this post was submitted on 14 Dec 2023
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Autism

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A community for respectful discussion and memes related to autism acceptance. All neurotypes are welcome.

We have created our own instance! Visit Autism Place the following community for more info.

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What is bothering you right now? (lemmy.world)
submitted 11 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
46 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

We’re autistic, and one of the characteristics of being autistic is that we feel things deeply. On the positive side, when we are happy, we feel immense joy compared to others. On the negative side, we feel painful emotions more strongly than others as well. Because of this, many of us have been invalidated, insulted, or pushed away when all we were wanting was to share what we were going through and get support. Maybe even a really tight hug and someone telling us that it makes sense that we feel that way.

While we can’t give hugs, we can help each other by sharing our pain and having others help us through it. So here is that post. What’s bothering you? Why? Tell us.

Note 1: Sort by New to see the most recent posts.

Note 2: This post in particular will be especially moderated in terms of trolling, abusive, derogatory, offensive, disrespectful, invalidating, accusatory, or antagonizing responses to a user's pain. If your response is removed by mods, but you think you make a valid point, try rephrasing it in a compassionate manner that is not dismissing or accusatory.

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

Feel like I don't fit in anywhere no matter where the where is. I've been in a gajillion World of Warcraft guilds over my almost 19 years of playing. And in all that time I've never met anyone who was a lasting friend or play partner. When I was in school I tried to join the LGBTQIA+ plus club and was ostracized out of the first get together I went to because I said I didn't have a problem talking to respectful people about my trans status. I have no friends in person (especially since I don't leave the house but once a week to get groceries) and have maybe one friend online but we don't really have anything to connect over or do together.

Every time I find a place to call 'home' it feels like I'm not wanted in that space after a period of time that is short as a few hours to a year later. When I try to talk about the thing a group is about I'm not positive enough for them or I'm too intense.

Each day I wake up and curse to myself that I did. Like I want to break down crying but I can't. I'm so worn out and it doesn't matter. I can't talk to my mom about it. I can't talk to my friend about it. I'm too poor to get help and I don't have a 20 year medical record following me to get help. If I died in my sleep it'd at least be an end to my constant silent suffering, the tinnitus, the lack of energy, the dysphoria and physical pain. No more loneliness or cursing the monster in the mirror whos skin I am forced to wear.