this post was submitted on 23 Nov 2023
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Autism

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Does anyone just wish so much of the burden wasn't put on you? (lemmy.world)
submitted 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
16 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

It seems like all the onus is on to socialise in the meantime you are relentlessly judged for how you go about socialising or dating. I am on college right now and I am seriously struggling to make friendships. My anxiety is kinda on overdrive because of it. I am expected to know if I am welcome to come or not but if I am not supposed I am judged severely. Meanwhile there's no one really coming up to me trying to help me. You know I'd like to just once be good enough for someone to come up to me and say that they just want to be around me. Enough of the guesswork. I am tired of it. I'm in my mid 20s just give me a fucking break at this point. So much of my "disability" would just go away if people had the decency to fucking educate themselves and expect me to know everything. I put myself out there and talk to people. I've done my fucking part.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 9 months ago

I don't think that's what they're saying. Think about the reasons why you want a friend or romantic partner, and then have a good idea how you expect those relationships to enhance your life and what kinds of behaviors you're not willing to put up with. Then you have to brainstorm about what strengths you have that can enhance other people's lives, and honestly consider what kinds of patterns you may do or say that others are not willing to put up with. Healthy relationships are built around giving and supporting in a positive way, so try to focus on being positive and making personal progress so that others will see you as a kind, positive person and want to be around you.