this post was submitted on 10 Nov 2023
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[–] [email protected] 174 points 9 months ago (16 children)
  1. I don't intend to victim blame or defend any abusers here; this shit is vile and should not be tolerated, period.

  2. From the below, it sounds like it was determined that, despite Omegle's moderation efforts, Omegle could have done better in areas relating to age verification and matchmaking. So I'm not trying to defend or minimize Omegle's role either, I don't know the details of how the site worked but it sounds like this was a problem for a long time:

the judge in A.M.’s case found last July that Omegle’s design was at fault and it was not protected by Section 230: It could have worked to prevent matches between minors and adults before sexual content was even sent, the judge said.

  1. However, I really don't like the choice of phrasing "forced", and I wonder whether that's poor paraphrasing or actually taken from the lawsuit.

Her lawsuit, filed in 2021, alleged that she met a man in his thirties on Omegle who forced her to take naked photos and videos over a three-year period. She was just 11 when it began in 2014.

Again, to be clear, not trying to say that the victim should, or even could, have done anything differently. Victim blaming is bad. But how the hell are they saying "forced" to do something by some scumbag over the internet? What kind of conditions does a kid have to be in at home to feel like they can't turn to their parent/guardian for help in a terrifying situation like that? How is an 11-year-old in 2014 being allowed to get into that situation in the first place, between her parents and her school?

It seems like this victim was failed by every support system she should have been able to rely on. This is so messed up. This is exactly why we need things like sex education and Internet safety education.

[–] [email protected] 73 points 9 months ago (2 children)

This is a failure of parenting. WTF is an 11 year old doing on Omegle?

[–] [email protected] 90 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (33 children)

It just isn’t that simple. I’ve got four kids. At least one of them ended up watching a naked man on Omegle once. And I say this because they were in a group of friends and dared each other on, on a school trip, and they were discovered (one of them felt pretty shocked and told a teacher) and we had a big discussion with her.

Kids do dumb shit all the time. Omegle is (was) very much known about amongst them all.

So, even with careful parenting and a locked down internet, and policies not to have phones upstairs in your room, kids do dumb shit or find a new service that isn’t in your filter, because they’ve heard about it through their friends. I know because my wife and I carefully raise four kids and the internet is a fucking onslaught to a dopamine dependent, approval seeking teenager.

I’m not saying “it’s all Omegle’s fault”. Everyone had a role to play. But let’s not pretend Omegle was blameless.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You can parent your children all day long and everything is just fine at home. As soon as your kids are unleashed into the world of school, it's anything goes. Your child is immediately subjected to all the poor and awful parenting that is outside your control. The only thing you can do is give them skills to navigate those situations. Sounds like @[email protected] did just that. Bravo.

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

It's almost like we should focus on educating them about how to responsibly use the Internet instead of trying to censor their access to it (which as you pointed out, basically never works).

Does anyone actually think shutting down one specific website will make a meaningful difference? Like... really? Did shutting down Napster stop piracy? Did shutting down Silk Road stop online drug sales?

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[–] [email protected] 50 points 9 months ago (1 children)

But how the hell are they saying “forced” to do something by some scumbag over the internet?

There was a group from Brazil doing stuff like that and got publicized when they were arrested recently. Usually they'd coerce the minor into sending one picture, then use it as blackmail against them to give them more. They might even gaslight them to convince them that they'll get in big trouble if they tell anyone and it'll just get worse for them.

I've seen full fledged adults taken hard by scammers and willingly giving them thousands of dollars against their own interests, and they heavily distrust and resist anyone trying to help them. I can only imagine accomplishing that with a child that lacks long term thinking skills is even more effective.

[–] Jakeroxs 6 points 9 months ago

Literally a black mirror episode

[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (2 children)

children are incredibly easy to influence. "if you don't do it I will find where you live and harm your family, and do not call the cops/tell your parents" is often enough threat.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 9 months ago

The common thing I've seen in more well -knowncases was the abuser striking up a relationship and pretending to be somebody younger, getting compromising details/photos from the victim, then threatening to release those to family/friends unless the victim follows their wishes (which often providing further sexual images/acts).

Not sure if that might be the case with a service like Omegle, but it was essentially what happened in the Amanda Todd case and other similar cases.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

what if the children play Roblox and are aware of the existence of pedos, they will be more careful right?

[–] [email protected] 20 points 9 months ago (2 children)

What kind of conditions does a kid have to be in at home to feel like they can't turn to their parent/guardian for help in a terrifying situation like that?

Or… close the tab?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago

Or click unmatch

[–] mayoi 6 points 9 months ago

I was in special condition where it was common sense to not trust or even lie to strangers. Some groomers would ask my address and I'd give them address of local FBI office.

[–] ZzyzxRoad 5 points 9 months ago (3 children)

God, this entire comment section is nothing but

"I'm not victim blaming, but..."

"personal responsibility"

"parents should be doing blah blah blah....no, I don't have kids."

The best parents in the world still can't control what their kids are doing every second of every day. Kids will always find ways around every single thing that's meant to restrict what they can do, see, or hear. I'm sure you never did stuff you weren't supposed to when you were a kid...right?

[–] [email protected] 18 points 9 months ago

Yeah, and we could shut down the Internet all together... or we could be realistic about prevention.

And yes, I accessed lots of 'sensitive' material online as a kid well before this website existed. So I find it hard to blame this specific website...websites come and go. I do however absolutely blame the creep himself since they are the one who did something wrong. Not the website.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago (2 children)

I'll do it then, I am victim-blaming. An 11 year old broke the rules and logged onto a website that she shouldn't be on and then somehow a 30 year old guy forced her to take naked pictures. The problem wasn't the website, it's this child that broke the rules and doesn't know not to do things for strangers on the internet.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Dude, the victim is literally a child.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

Hence why it's easy to understand that she made this mistake. Her parents might as well sue the ISP for enabling this communication to take place.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (2 children)

An 11 year old child should be expected to break rules and at times end up where they aren't supposed to be. 30 year old fucking predators shouldn't be taking advantage of that.

This is like shaming a 20 year old for dressing in a gogo skirt, raping her, and then saying "she was asking for it".

No. She wasn't the problem. Your depraved ass was.

Men are fucking pigs and I don't trust the lot of you.

Source: me. A man and a father.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Sure, but shutting down the website is like shutting down the club that the slutty 20 year old dressed up slutty for and went to on the night a creep raped her. Maybe she had a fake ID (if USA at least). And yeah, perhaps the club should be more careful about fake IDs. But the club didn't rape anyone, the rapist did. And shutting down club A for club B to replace it will do nothing to prevent future rapes.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

No offense to the good people in Omegle but let's be real, that site like many other of these "anonymous chat" sites are rife with people like that dude. If a website can't better control the traffic then shut it down. A night club has a bouncer and to your point can check and ID and fake or not I highly doubt an 11 year old is getting in.

Shutting down the site is a small price to pay to protect youth doing what youth are made to do which is test limits.

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

Thank you for adding just another reason for the myriad of pre-existing ones that convinced me of never having kids.

[–] PM_ME_FEET_PICS 1 points 9 months ago

Chat Roulette, the site Omegle copied the video format from, had a built in report option that would ban nude people.

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