this post was submitted on 09 Nov 2023
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Then the years go on, the kid becomes an adult and begins cooking for themselves. The first meal they make for someone else they realize (1) how difficult it is to estimate when a meal will be done (2) how much work goes into cooking, especially for a whole family and (3) how hurtful and disruptive it is when the person you're cooking for decides they'd rather eat your food when it's cold and gross and everyone else has already finished eating and are trying to clean up. And that's not even incorporating the social elements of family dinner time the kid is eschewing. I didn't understand as a kid why my parents were so adamant about family dinner, but as an adult it's something I'm really glad they enforced.
You're right, but also remember to say it out loud.
Communication is so underrated but I guarantee most people would listen and be willing to accommodate you more if you just bring it up casually, instead of waiting until they discover it for themselves or until you blow up from being frustrated and underappreciated
GET OUT OF YOUR ROOM AND EAT.
IF YOU DECIDE TO NOT EAT WITH EVERYONE, YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR OWN DISHES.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO EAT JUST AN ENTIRE HEAD OF LETTUCE FOR DINNER.
YOU CANNOT EAT DRY RAMEN WITH NO SEASONING FOR DINNER.
YOU CANNOT EAT JUST GREEN BEANS FOR DINNER.
YOU CANNOT SKIP DINNER THEN EAT NOTHING BUT JUNK FOOD AT MIDNIGHT WHEN EVERYONE GOES TO BED.
Repeated ad nauseum for half a decade.
I've cooked for others at home before. I do not care what they do after the meal is ready.
Yeah well there's cooking as in purely functional preparation of nutrients, and then there's cooking as in a process of caring for others by creating a worthwhile experience of food that is needed, engaging, and delicious. The downside is this experience usually has a time limit dependent on time and others' availability (eating hot food together). It's sad for such effort to go to waste. The alternative extreme to this kind of nurturing is abandoning the idea that family time over meals is worthwhile and just shitting out nutrient bricks so the children don't starve. I don't think anyone really wins in the long run with that.
Exactly! When you're a teenager it's hard to appreciate these things. I know I definitely took it for granted but I at least respected my family enough to not start an online game around dinner time.