this post was submitted on 02 Nov 2023
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Asklemmy

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[โ€“] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago (10 children)
  1. Their fingernails. It sounds weird, but you can tell a lot about a person by how maintained their nails are. If they have long gross unkept nails, it says a lot. Versus trimmed and clean nails.

  2. I always do dinner and a movie for Date 1. At dinner, how do they treat the staff? Are they kind, do they thank the worker for their help? Do they tip well? Do they take forever to pick an item off the menu? When I offer to pay, do they initially counter offer for them to pay or us split at least?

  3. I'd just ask them their thoughts on trans folks wanting to participate in the Olympics with their same gender. The way they react to a hardball question pretty quickly outs any red flags.

[โ€“] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago (3 children)
[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I will try. This comes up frequently these days with my Trumper friend, so this could be valuable to discuss here.

I think it would be fine for them to compete provided we can ensure a level playing field. I don't know what that would entail, but studies should be done to get it figured out. Is it a blood draw for testosterone levels (maybe not.. sometimes that's naturally high for either cis gender)? Maybe estrogen? Maybe it's number of years post transition, though I see difficulty defining the start.

Definitely a tough issue since if we get it wrong and be too accepting or not accepting enough, many athletes will suffer. I would love to hear some more ideas and thoughts on this. I'm tired of getting shot down trying to talk to this guy.

[โ€“] Benj1B 5 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

I saw one suggestion which was to so away with male and female competitions, and instead have "open" and "restricted" comps. Open would be available to anyone, male or female, while you could set up as many restricted comps as you needed for the particular sport or activity with whatever rules make sense. So the 100m sprint might have Open, Restricted - Testosterone, and Restricted - Height - with whatever T level or height in centimetres decided by the relevant authority. Whereas something like weightlifting might have Restricted - Weight as it's own class. The idea being any gender can compete provided provided meet the restrictions in place to make an interesting/fair competition within that bracket.

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