this post was submitted on 18 Oct 2023
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Clever Comebacks

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Posts of clever comebacks in response to someone.

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[–] [email protected] 75 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Man, if someone told me they were going to get rid of my cat, I'd never see them again. And if they actually tried, no one else would, either

[–] [email protected] 22 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (3 children)

No joke. Cats are a civilized companion for a civilized man.

What I don’t understand is why a lady would prefer to get finger blasted by someone who just picked up dog poop nary an hour ago with that same hand. Cats rule, dogs drool.

Edit: apparently I needed an /s here to make it clear that my word choice is meant to be flip. The dog mafia can stand down.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago (3 children)

I mean I agree in principle, but I did once had a cat who drooled a lot!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)

My cats both had severe untreated syphilis when they were kittens which fucked up their sinuses. One of them just has a leaky eye but the other has two fucked up inner eyelids, two leaky eyes, and a VERY leaky nose. She will have sneezing fits randomly and it's like D-Day. We take cover or quickly scoot her to the hardwood floor to limit what she covers in snot lmao. Love them both to death though

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

How does a kitten get syph... you know what, don't answer that

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

It's actually very common for cats! It's spread by saliva mainly, from cats biting or scratching each other so my cats are strictly indoors. Though I'm pretty sure mine got it from their mom. They were rescues, brought in to my roommates clinic where she works as a vet technician.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago

Thank you for understanding that I was joking, lol. Yeah, I’ve lived with some drooly boys too—some of the sweetest cats I’ve known.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Please throw your phone and computer off of the nearest roof and never log onto the Internet ever again.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Big lube will never silence me!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

That's alright they didn't pick it up they just left it in the streets like a REAL MAN