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How does anyone believe in monogamy nowadays? (lemm.ee)

submitted 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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Not talking about being with one partner at a time. Talking about the idea of finding "the one" and being with them your whole life.

50% divorce rate. 97% of people (in the US) don't wait till marriage, so most of us have multiple sexual partners prior to the one we stick with. Many have children with more than one partner.

How can anyone look at the world and think, yeah, there's one that's meant for everyone and just one?

Also hope I don't come across disrespectful. If you do believe in monogamy, I am interested in hearing from you. I'm just buzzed and thinking about my own love life and being curt

Edit: Speaking to the idea that it's the "natural order" or default. Not that it can't work in individual circumstances, especially when we've been programmed for decades

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago

My first several relationships were just trial and error of figuring out what works. I ended up meeting a widower and we both knew exactly what we wanted and expected in a partner and expressed it clearly to each other. We moved in together after just a few months and have enjoyed a beautiful life together.

"The One" is just a person that you can be happy with because you express your needs and they meet them, and they express their needs and you meet them. And you're both willing to put in the work to get through the times when needs can't be met.