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How does anyone believe in monogamy nowadays? (lemm.ee)

submitted 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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Not talking about being with one partner at a time. Talking about the idea of finding "the one" and being with them your whole life.

50% divorce rate. 97% of people (in the US) don't wait till marriage, so most of us have multiple sexual partners prior to the one we stick with. Many have children with more than one partner.

How can anyone look at the world and think, yeah, there's one that's meant for everyone and just one?

Also hope I don't come across disrespectful. If you do believe in monogamy, I am interested in hearing from you. I'm just buzzed and thinking about my own love life and being curt

Edit: Speaking to the idea that it's the "natural order" or default. Not that it can't work in individual circumstances, especially when we've been programmed for decades

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

My wife and I started dating when I was 16 and she was 15. We have been together 37 years, married for 30.

I don't believe in the concept of "the one". I think when a long term relationship like ours succeeds, it's because there is something fundamental that both people have in common.

By fundamental, I'm talking about fairly obvious stuff like "wanting to put in the effort to be in a long term relationship".

I was watching something on TV with my wife the other day and a character said something to the effect of, "marriage means you standing at the sink having a shave while your wife sits on the can clipping her toenails".

I've always said that marriage is about making sure your spouse doesn't drown in the toilet while vomiting.

Also, as many people have pointed out, the "50% of marriages end in divorce" statistic is bullshit.