this post was submitted on 07 Aug 2023
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For real. I’d actually go back to theaters for it
I'd pay 3 times the amount of a regular ticket to watch the scene where Terry Crews, in a gorgeous ball gown, is dancing with Prince Charming, and when realizing it's almost midnight, flexes his pecs, and yells goodbye before disappearing into the night.
Prince Charming then goes around trying to find the perfect pec flex. Alternatively, bicep circumference would also be acceptable as a glass slipper alternative.
You're thinking Cinderella, not Snow White.
Wait which ones Snow White?
The one with the seven dwarves. Which opens up a lot of interesting casting choices.
Then we cast Terry Crews for the other one too.
For Snow White, we need Danny Devito, Warwick Davis, Bridget Powers, Daniel Radcliffe, Elijah Wood, Gary Oldman, and Nicolas Cage for the roles of the dwarves. For the Wicked Queen, Andy Samberg, and the mirror is Margot Robbie using the Harley Quinn voice. If Margot is unavailable, we have Tom Cruise as Les Grossman as the mirror.
Just cast Terry Crews as all of them, Eddie Murphy style
Elijah really needs to start leaning into how fucking weird he has allowed himself to become since LotR. And I know he has a little, but clearly it's not enough.
If you haven't seen Wilfred, watch it NOW. It's amazing. It gets weirder and weirder towards the end. It's absolutely fucking amazing.
Will do, thanks brother
Boban Marjonovic plays all 7 dwarves